Where do we turn when we make a mistake?
Shame is when we believe we are a bad person because we have done something wrong.
It keeps us hiding and secretive, because we wouldn’t want anyone else to find out about the “bad person” that we really are.
Sometimes other people play a lot into shame.
A kid hears their mom making judgmental comments about the kid next door, and they assume that if their mom knew they were caught up in the same thing, mom would judge and talk badly about them too.
A youth leader makes an analogy in a church lesson that makes the teen listening feel like they have lost their worth because of a mistake they have made.
These are so sad, and I’m constantly trying to get rid of any “shaming” that I may inadvertently do in my parenting or in my teaching.
But other times, I think we are really good at inventing the shame all in our head.
“They heard the voice of the Lord God… and Adam and his wife went to hide themselves from the presence of the Lord God amongst the trees of the garden.” (Moses 4:14)
Did God shame Adam and Eve when they had their discussion about what had happened?
Not at all.
In fact, I think God gives us a perfect parenting example of asking curious questions, showing love, teaching about a natural consequence, showing even more love, and then even giving them a beautifully symbolic gift of a coat of skins to protect them as they left the garden.
But Adam and Eve, as natural, fallen, humans at this point, still felt that shame and wanted to hide from God.
Feeling like we need to hide because we have sinned is a natural thing to do.
But the more that we learn about the nature of God and Christ, ideally, the less shame we feel.
Because we are instead filled with Their love.
God never turns away anyone who wants to run toward Him and ask for help, no matter what sins they’ve committed.
So where do we turn when we have sinned?
Do we hide it and hope no one ever knows? Or do we place it at the Lord’s feet in full humility, ready to be cleansed and changed?
“Because of Jesus Christ, our failures do not have to define us. They can refine us.” – Dieter F. Uchtdorf
Happy Studying!
-Cali Black
