Sometimes it’s a long long long wait for the blessing.
So many times, a trial gets thrown my way, and I start to think, “What am I supposed to learn from this?”
There’s a part of me that thinks if I learn my lessons quickly enough, then the trial might end sooner.
But sometimes… the trial is just the worst.
It’s heavy. It’s no fun. There’s no end in sight.
And I can’t find even a shred of a lesson to be learned anywhere.
Except… just endure.
Several years ago, I endured a few months of a severe trial.
It was kicking my booty.
And then, the trial was over.
I felt so much better, lighter, more free…
But I still didn’t know what lesson I was supposed to learn from it.
I thought I would get clarity afterwards. But the trial just seemed dark still, even looking back.
Hmmmm. Maybe there wasn’t a lesson to learn other than that life is just hard sometimes.
One day, a friend called me and told me about her latest trial.
It was exactly what I had experienced.
I turned into full-on empathy mode. I told her to complain to me. I constantly checked in with her.
I told her that I knew this was the worst, and that there wasn’t much that was going to make it better and that I was so sorry.
And then I heard about someone else I didn’t know super well who was going through the same trial.
It felt a little awkward at first, but I knew I needed to reach out and lend an understanding listening ear.
Finally one evening, I reflected.
What if THAT was the blessing?
What if the blessing of my trial was the empathy that I gained for others? For the future acts of service I could perform because I perfectly understood how crushing it was to endure?
The Lord taught in D&C 103:12: “For after much tribulation… cometh the blessing.“
Sometimes the blessings are evident during the trial. Sometimes they are evident right afterwards.
But sometimes… sometimes it’s not until after.
Long after.
That we begin to see what the blessing might have been.
Happy Studying!
-Cali Black
6 Responses
I am currently going through a divorce, we were sealed in the temple. I thought I had finally got it right, that he was who would be with me through eternity not just here. But yet, he quit. I’m a convert of almost 4 years, and this just hurts so much, I feel so let down and discouraged…disappointed. His family that I admired for their faith has turned out to be just as disappointing. I know that I didn’t join the church for any of them, at all, but satan sure is using this to hurt my faith.
I don’t want this lesson to be able to have empathy. I know divorce, I know disappointment…I don’t need another dose to feel more for others that may go through it.
I just don’t understand and maybe I never will.
I’m older now and I empathize with you and your feelings. I have gone through HARD trials. May I say that you will understand, but the Lord’s timing is different than ours. You may understand today, or in one of your tomorrows, or when you pass through the veil, but you will understand. Don’t give up on your faith, be strong in it. This is what I do know. The gospel of Jesus Christ has been restored to the earth and the fullness of it is in THE CHURCH OF JESUS CHRIST OF LATTER DAY SAINTS.
I’m so sorry that you are going through such a tough trial! I hope in time you will be able to see the Lord’s hand and find peace and comfort. <3
While serving as the bishop of our ward I fell off a roof I was working on and shattered my heel. It took months to recover and still hurts after 17 years. After my injury there were several people in our ward and stake who had bad ankle and leg injuries. I had so much empathy for them and my wife had so much empathy for their spouse/ care giver. We could go and visit and really understand. Before that injury I would not go visit people who were injured. I didn’t know what to say. After my injury I knew what to say. What a blessing it was for us.
What a wonderful way to consecrate your trial and seek for opportunities for improvement and growth. Thank you so much for sharing!
Yes it is hard to go through these types of trials and I would not wish it upon anyone. I have found that in “every” trial there is a place within us that is pure light and no matter the darkness we may feel, the “light” is always there for us. That “light” is who we really are! It is our divine potential, our birthright and inheritance! It cannot be destroyed by anyone. It cannot be take from us. It cannot be violate, desecrated or disappear. It is our “holy of holies” and will always be there for us, but we must enter and embrace it. It is how we connect to Christ and Father personally.