We had one of THOSE meetings scheduled.
This was a few years ago when it was just my husband, our 1-year-old daughter, and me.
It was a meeting with a member of the stake presidency where we knew my husband would be extended a calling.
Gulp.
We had lots of fun speculating what the calling could possibly be.
But while we were speculating, I suddenly had a thought clearly come to my mind:
“This calling will take a lot of time.
“You need to learn to not resent him for leaving you with your daughter more often.”
It was a very clear thought.
I think my husband and I are a fantastic team usually.
We’ve always been very clear that we are both equal partners when we are home.
We take turns making dinner, we care for our kids, we do household chores.
Things honestly have felt pretty “fair”.
But I felt the Spirit preparing me that things might not be “fair” for a while.
And that I needed to be okay with that.
In fact, I needed to find JOY in my counterpart offering of service to his service.
Paul’s teaching to the Corinthians stopped me in my tracks — because I have lived this.
“Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loveth a cheerful giver.” (2 Corinthians 9:7)
Since that day 4 years ago when my husband was called as a counselor in the bishopric, and then continuing to his call as a bishop, my heart has slowly changed.
I’ve had to take on extra responsibilities and get comfortable doing things by myself.
But am I giving my service grudgingly?
I honestly try not to.
(I mean, it still happens, but then I try to give myself grace and press forward.)
Sometimes, I just try to serve out of “necessity”.
It’s pretty neutral— I’m just doing what needs to get done.
But my goal is to be a cheerful giver!
Not to put on a fake smile and act like everything is okay.
But to truly be cheerful to be able to serve in the way I’m asked to right now.
To find joy in taking on different responsibilities.
To be happy to develop my weaknesses into strengths.
It’s been a process.
But it’s been easier and easier to catch when I’m feeling “grudgingly” or resentful and willingly focus on my Savior instead.
And truly, honestly, when I think about Jesus, my heart becomes a lot more willing and joyful.
I’m taking steps to become a more cheerful giver of my time and energy.
And hopefully, someday, my selfish weaknesses can become a strength, all thanks to my Savior.
Happy Studying!
-Cali Black
2 Responses
I always appreciate you sharing personal experiences. You are inspiring and impressive! Thank you for all you share!! ❤️
Thank you! <3