I have to admit that while I feel very passionately about sharing some of my thoughts on this, I don’t want to imply that I think I’ve gotten this all figured out, or that this list is exhaustive. I welcome any additional comments and suggestions.

• Listen to others without thinking of a rebuttal. When people say they feel uncomfortable in a certain situation, avoid telling them that they are wrong because you don’t experience it, and instead just listen and empathize.

• Volunteer in spaces that make you uncomfortable, so that you can experience how others might feel “out of place” in settings where you feel comfortable.

• Expose your children to other cultures in natural and normal ways. Have toys, books, and media that show people who don’t look like your family.

• Elder Cook said: “As leaders, we are not under the illusion that in the past all relationships were perfect, all conduct was Christlike, or all decisions were just.” So we can avoid trying to justify everything in the past, instead acknowledging that it might be uncomfortable to hear.

• See other people’s various races and cultures, and celebrate or ask about them. “Unity and diversity are not opposites.” – Elder Cook.

• Remember that “Child of God” is everyone’s top identity. We promote unity by seeing others as He sees them.

• Humbly pray for help: Help to see your own harmful attitudes and actions, and help to know how to fix them.

• Invite an abundance of Christ into your life. When we expose ourselves to our Savior’s words and teachings often and sincerely, we can’t help but feel natural love for those around us – although, this may take a lifetime for the process to occur, just as ridding ourselves of any other sin.

“I plead with you to promote respect for all of God’s children.” – President Nelson

I believe that our church can be a light on the hill for how to treat everyone with respect and love – but it will take a lot of work on all of our parts.

And the Lord loves effort. Because effort brings reward.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Jesus said, “Love everyone” first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

These phrases that sound so good at first. They make beautiful graphics. Everyone nods in agreement and writes them down.

Phrases like, or variations of, “Don’t judge.” “Love everyone.” “You are important.”

But what do these phrases actually LOOK like in day-to-day living?

I guess that’s why I made this account and started this whole journey.

I’ve always wanted to move past some of the platitudes in the scriptures and conference talks, and instead talk about what they actually look like in real, messy situations.

And that’s what made me love President Nelson’s talk.

Because he talked about “God will prevail”, which sounds really nice and important.

But he also gave tons of examples of applications. Among them:

“When your greatest desire is to let God prevail, to be part of Israel, so many decisions become easier.

“So many issues become nonissues!

“You know how best to groom yourself.

“You know what to watch and read, where to spend your time, and with whom to associate.

“You know what you want to accomplish.

“You know the kind of person you really want to become.”

Boom.

These types of statements are what give life and meaning to those “platitudes”.

If I let God prevail in my life, what do I actually want to accomplish with the time I’ve been given?

If I let God prevail in my life, what kinds of attitudes and characteristics do I want to develop, and what things should I let fall away?

If I let God prevail in my life… (insert basically any life question here!).

And suddenly, it all makes a little more sense.

I don’t think anyone (at least anyone reading this) would disagree that letting God prevail sounds like a bad idea.

But I think it is essential to take that time to ponder and think – what does letting God prevail actually look like in my career choice? In how I comfort my child? In how I use my time?

Because that is true religion – letting lofty and godly ideals shape our actions here on earth.

So how are you applying this? How are YOU choosing to let God prevail right now? Share below! 

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

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The post Let God prevail first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

They were referring to political opinions, but to me, this is the perfect framework for all of life.

It reminded me of another favorite phrase: “When people know better, they do better.”

These all sound so good in theory.

But this is where the rubber meets the road in terms of religion.

Because guess what our brains really love?

Habits. Routine. Same old, same old.

Not changing.

The “natural man” within us wants us to stay the way we are.

But the natural man is an enemy to God.

And so, we try to use the information we learn in order to change.

We read scriptures, we listen to hours of General Conference, we attend church, we have conversations with loved ones, we read articles…

We learn more. We learn how to be better.

And when we gain that knowledge, we have to go through that painful but essential growth of repentance.

Every single day.

We use that knowledge to fuel change in our lives.

And that’s what enduring means. Repenting. Changing. Every day.

In that two-part process: learning more, and then changing to fit our new knowledge.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Changing until the end first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

(I believe the BYU SSA club has since changed its name.)

It was for an assignment in my multicultural education class.

The assignment? Go somewhere that put you in the minority and made you uncomfortable.

Some of my friends attended a Catholic mass, but I felt pulled to go to this club meeting for students experiencing same sex attraction while at BYU.

And boy, was I uncomfortable when I first walked in that room. I felt like I was somewhere that I didn’t belong.

But I knew that was the purpose of the assignment. I was supposed to feel out of place.

And then the meeting started. And the Spirit of God filled that room.

And I do not say that lightly.

The people in the room emanated true Christlike love.

They shared openly, honestly, and courageously about the things they had been struggling with.

They talked about their wrestles with the Lord. They talked about their wins and successes. They talked about temptations and deep, serious trials. They cried. They laughed.

And I cried and laughed along with them.

My heart was filled with pure, powerful, Christlike love for every person in that room.

I felt guilty that I had ever felt uncomfortable, but it gave me just a minuscule glimpse at what these children of God had been experiencing every single day for years.

I didn’t know how much my heart needed to be in that meeting.

That was me, unknowingly at the time and under the guise of a school assignment, doing just a small portion of the real work it takes to be a true Christian.

I went in very uncomfortable.

And I left as a friend who continued to be an ally and an advocate.

It’s been a while though since I sat in that meeting, and I think I need to be uncomfortable more often. I need to grow in my love and service, which means getting out of my stagnant comfort zone.

And this is why Elder Holland’s talk stuck with me.

I need to stop putting the ultimate prize on being comfortable, and start focusing on being uncomfortable in order to become more Christlike.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Christianity is uncomfortable first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.