Ever heard or seen a variation of that comment anywhere before?⁣

(Orrrrr maybe even thought something like that before?⁣)

In 2015, Elder Christofferson gave one of those General Conference talks that has just stuck in my mind, titled: “Why the Church”.

Elder Christofferson spends his entire talk outlining why we actually are organized into and asked to attend a church. ⁣

Spirituality is, of course, a personal journey. ⁣

But there are unique purposes for an organized church.⁣

He said, among many things: ⁣

“In the Church we not only learn divine doctrine; we also experience its application.”⁣

This is what I’ve learned to love about church the most, especially recently. ⁣

We teach each other with new perspectives in church, and we practice applying what “loving your neighbor” and service really look like.

In Doctrine and Covenants 43:8, the Lord counsels members of the church: ⁣

“That when ye are assembled together ye shall instruct and edify each other, that ye may know how to act and direct my church, how to act upon the points of my law and commandments, which I have given.”⁣

We need to interact with and edify people who are lacking. ⁣

Someone at church needs to see you, being exactly who you are. ⁣

They need to hear that comment you’ll make, or just see you showing up after they know you had a tough week. ⁣

So why the church? ⁣

There are many beautiful answers to this question (seriously, just go listen to Elder Christofferson’s talk, because obviously the Sacrament is THE main reason). ⁣

But today, I’m loving the answer that we need each other.

Not the perfect versions of ourselves that we think we need to become first. ⁣

But we need each other, exactly as we are. ⁣

Messy, unsure, overwhelmed, trying our best, super tired, feeling inadequate…⁣

We can show up exactly as we are, and still instruct and edify others. And we need to be instructed and edified by other people, no matter who they are.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Why go to church? first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Well, maybe not super easy. ⁣

But at least, I think could do it. ⁣

But…

Some of my highest highs AND my lowest lows in life have come from interacting with other people. ⁣

I’ve laughed til my belly aches and cried in moments of vulnerability with good friends. ⁣

And I’ve endured awkward moments and painful misunderstandings with good friends, too. ⁣

I’ve experienced more love than I ever thought possible with my family members. ⁣

And I’ve had to practice patience and forgiveness more than I ever thought possible with my family members. ⁣

I’ve been uplifted and edified by things that my fellow ward members have said. ⁣

And I’ve been shocked and frustrated by things that my fellow ward members have said. ⁣

I’ve had sweet, kind interactions with strangers at parks, stores, or schools. ⁣

And I’ve had terribly rude interactions with strangers at parks, stores, and schools. ⁣

Getting outside of ourselves is where life gets extra messy, but also extra beautiful. ⁣

And I think that’s why the Lord reminds the Saints as they prepared to move to Ohio that they HAD to look out for each other. ⁣

They couldn’t just each take the journey on their own with their own resources. ⁣

Well, maybe a few of them could have made it in their own that way, but they would have left a lot of people in the dust in New York. ⁣

And so the Lord cautioned in D&C 38:27, “If ye are not one ye are not mine”.⁣

We NEED each other. ⁣

The second great commandment is to love our neighbor as ourselves. ⁣

And so if the adversary can get us to just think about ourselves all the time, he’s won half the battle. ⁣

We have to be one. ⁣

We have to experience the messes that come from meeting new people, awkward moments, and misunderstandings so that we can also practice living the gospel in action. ⁣

Unity and oneness can’t begin if we don’t even know each other. ⁣

And if we are not one, then we are not His.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Kind strangers, frustrating strangers  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I had so many things on my to-do list, and after a tough day with my kids…

I just honestly didn’t want to be there.

There was a service activity set up on the tables that required us to sew.

(Something that I am not good at.)

I glanced over at the dessert table in the corner and noticed it was filled with cheesecake.

(My least favorite dessert.)

Pride is one of the sneakiest sins because it’s tricky to notice.

I wish I could tell you I had a change of heart at that service activity…

But I didn’t.

It wasn’t until I was reflecting later that I realized most of my bad attitude stemmed from me thinking all about myself and what I thought was best.

What if I had walked in with a humble attitude, ready to serve and do God’s will?

Maybe I could have made a new friend.

Or comforted someone else who was having a rough day, too.

Maybe I could have humbly tried to learn a new skill and strengthened a friendship in the process.

Maybe I could have offered to help clean up while others enjoyed dessert so the organizers wouldn’t have to stay late.

The Lord so succinctly warns: “Beware of pride.” (D&C 38:39)

It is truly so difficult to weed out pride in our fallen state.

But I have found it becomes much easier when I think:

“Is this what a humble servant of God with a soft and willing heart would do?”

Beware of pride.

“Simply stated, if you or I do not believe we could be afflicted with and by pride, then we are vulnerable and in spiritual danger.” – David A. Bednar

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Beware of pride  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I’ve been there. ⁣

It’s rough. ⁣

But I’ve also come to believe that the trials we experience become our own specific superpowers to help us look out for those going through similar struggles. ⁣

They are little lessons for us. ⁣

You wished someone would have showed up on your doorstep with a treat and a hug? ⁣

Then we can be that person to someone else. ⁣

You wish your ministering sister would have at least checked in on you from time to time?⁣

Then we can check in on her often. ⁣

Life is so unbelievably unfair and difficult. ⁣

We can think about that all the time and wallow in self-pity for all the help we didn’t receive. ⁣

Or we can use that as fuel to become “that person” for someone else. ⁣

As the Saints in New York were asked to start making the journey to Ohio, they were advised by the Lord to especially look out for the poor and the needy. ⁣

This trip was going to take a lot of money and sacrifice, and the Lord didn’t want any of His children left behind due to financial hardship. ⁣

And so His counsel?⁣

“Let every man esteem his brother as himself”. (D&C 38:24)⁣

If YOU needed a place for your family to stay after selling your farm and before leaving for Ohio, what kind of help would you want?⁣

Then BE that kind of help for someone else. ⁣

Life is hard enough without spending time and energy on thinking about how unfair we have it. How forgotten we feel. How rough our hand of cards is. ⁣

And so I’d rather treat others the way that I wish that I had been treated. ⁣

To allow my trial to be my specific training for how to serve those around me even better. ⁣

We can be the change that we wish to see.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post I’ve been forgotten  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I was at a restaurant with some of my work colleagues a few years ago, and had just been introduced to someone new who had been hired onto our team.

This new colleague had asked me if I wanted him to get me a beer inside.

I told him thanks for the offer but that I didn’t drink alcohol.

He responded:

“Oh! Do you not drink because of your church, or is it a personal choice?”

I only had a split-second to gather my thoughts.

But I was somehow able to respond by saying:

“Well, I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, if that’s what you’re getting at, so yes, my religion asks us not to drink alcohol.

“But it is also a personal decision that I’ve made to follow that advice and not drink alcohol.”

He graciously said, “Of course, I get it!”

(For the record, we worked together very well afterward, so he obviously didn’t think I was too crazy for my response.)

Really, I just wanted to let him know that I didn’t abstain from alcohol only because my church told me not to.

I had made a personal decision to follow the counsel and had felt that decision confirmed to me many times.

The Lord gave the new Saints in New York a big, life-altering commandment to move to Ohio.

But the Lord ended this commandment with an interesting note:

“Behold, here is wisdom, and let every man choose for himself.” (D&C 37:4)

The Lord gives commandments.

The church gives guidelines.

Our prophet gives challenges.

Our bishop gives us callings.

And yet, we always get to choose for ourselves.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Why don’t you drink?  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

This is something I have internalized and believed for a long time.

Anyone else feel this way sometimes? ⁣

This idea that if I can’t handle taking care of my three kids in our comfortable home filled with good food and lots of toys, then I’m clearly not mentally strong enough. ⁣

And yet… that’s not even close to the message that the Savior teaches me. ⁣

David Whitmer, one of the Three Witnesses of the Book of Mormon, was chastened by the Lord in D&C 30:1:⁣

“You have feared man and have not relied on me for strength as you ought.”⁣

The Lord WANTS me to rely on Him for everything that I do each day. ⁣

He doesn’t want me to feel like I have to do everything alone. ⁣

Because He knows that my life will improve as I turn to Him. ⁣

When I’m sitting in my comfortable air-conditioned house and I’m having to clean up the third spill in the last hour while another kid has a meltdown over I’m not even sure what…⁣

He wants me to rely on Him. ⁣

To send up pleading prayers, asking for guidance and comfort and peace. ⁣

Am I living up to my privilege?⁣

I feel like my life is already dripping with privilege, and yet I think I’m missing out on obtaining the full power of the most essential privilege of all. ⁣

The Savior is not disappointed when I have to ask for help. ⁣

He doesn’t think that I’m not strong enough. ⁣

Or that I’ve failed. ⁣

He is disappointed when I DON’T ask for help. ⁣

When I try to rely on my own strength. ⁣

So how can I make my Savior pleased with me?⁣

I can ask for help. I can rely on Him for strength. ⁣

I can realize that I cannot do it alone, but that when I invite His divine assistance into my life, we are unstoppable.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Do it on your own  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I was in high school.

And someone told me about what someone else was saying.

And boy, did that make me mad.

Why was she saying bad things about me that weren’t even true?!

I started telling everyone about how rude she was.

How unfair she was.

How she didn’t understand my side of things.

Then, one day, it clicked.

I was now talking about HER behind her back!

When it was all said and done, this acquaintance said one poor thing about me to a handful of people.

And yet, I spent weeks saying poor things about this person to even more people.

The Lord taught Thomas B. Marsh some personal lessons.

Including that he should “. . . revile not against those that revile.”(D&C 31:9)

“Revile” means to criticize in an angry or abusive way.

Someone yelling at me, being rude to me, leaving me out, or criticizing me may hurt when it happens.

But it doesn’t mean that I yell, criticize, become rude, or intentionally leave others out in return.

I’ve been on a lifelong journey to try to control my emotions maturely, just as the Lord taught Thomas in this verse.

Instead, I try to focus on living the second great commandment:

Loving my neighbor as myself, completely independent of other people’s actions.

“We move toward loving our adversaries when we avoid anger and hostility toward those with whom we disagree.” – Pres Oaks

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Behind my back first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Heading out on the first mission for the tiny church. ⁣

Heading west, with a strong end goal, but not sure how the details would play out. ⁣

They were going to share the Book of Mormon with the Native American tribes west of Missouri. ⁣

And the Lord told them He would be in their midst. ⁣

And that if they decided to let God prevail in their personal lives, that He would prevail against any obstacles they met. ⁣

And within a few months, they would return back home…⁣

WITHOUT converting a whole bunch of Native Americans to the restored gospel. ⁣

A failed mission. ⁣

So… where was God?⁣

Why had they failed if God said that He would prevail?⁣

Because their mission resulted in the doubling of church membership. ⁣

DOUBLE. ⁣

It wasn’t the Native Americans. ⁣

It was the people they visited in Ohio along the way. ⁣

It was Sidney Rigdon. It was Edward Partridge. It was countless other faithful new Saints who were converted to the gospel of Jesus Christ. ⁣

God most certainly prevailed. ⁣

Because not ONLY did church membership double, but the next location for all the Saints to travel to was established. ⁣

A place that would be home to numerous essential revelations. ⁣

A place that would house the first temple of the Lord in this dispensation. ⁣

A place where the Savior, Jesus Christ Himself, would visit. ⁣

The Lord most certainly prevailed on the sacred mission that these four men faithfully embarked on. ⁣

But we can’t define “prevailing” as accomplishing the end goal that we had in mind. ⁣

I mean, even the Lord told them that their mission was to the native tribes!⁣

But how else would He had gotten these four faithful men to His beloved children in Ohio who were ready to hear the gospel?⁣

It wasn’t a failure. Not by a long stretch.⁣

When we let God prevail in our personal lives, nothing will prevail over us.

“I myself will go with them and be in their midst… and nothing shall prevail against them.” (D&C 32:3)

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post The failed mission  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I searched all the usual suspect places.

I asked my kids.

I looked in unusual places.

And then I did what I think most of us have learned to do in these types of situations:

I said a quick prayer and kept searching.

The Spirit loves action, right?!

Surely I’d be led to my keys now.

But……… nothing.

And I really had to leave to go somewhere.

I decided to say another prayer, but this time, I was going to be really sincere and then pause to listen for promptings.

I was surprised that when I prayed and paused, a calm but certain thought came to my mind that I WASN’T going to find my keys.

I knew that I needed to find another way to get where I was going.

When David Whitmer struggled, the Lord gave him this advice:

“You are left to inquire for yourself at my hand, and ponder upon the things which you have received.” (D&C 30:3)

Yes, we need to ask and inquire as we say prayers.

But we also need to ponder!

I was so sure that the Spirit would help me find my keys as I searched…

That I forgot to wait and listen for an answer.

And there have been other situations in my life when I’ve prayed, pondered, and then had my mind brought to an earlier conversation that suddenly seemed like an answer.

The Lord answers prayers when we ask.

But sometimes, and more often than I’d like to admit,

It’s possible I’m missing the little answers, the nudges, or the guidance because I’m not leaving time to ponder and listen.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post The lost keys first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Growing up, we are taught about the right thing to do and the wrong thing to do. ⁣

That’s what I’m teaching my little kids right now. ⁣

But somewhere along the way, I realized life is a whole lot messier than that. ⁣

There really is a spectrum of how we choose to respond to different situations.

Whether or not we serve others, worship in the temple, or choose to be a good spouse are complicated concepts that depend on lots of little choices.

Like… there are a lot of options for every single little thing. ⁣

In D&C 29:35, the Lord teaches: ⁣

“Behold, I gave unto him that he should be an agent unto himself” (meaning Adam).⁣

Agency is the power that we have to become whoever we want to be. ⁣

In the million degrees of every aspect of life, we get to choose and work toward where we want to be. ⁣

How service-oriented, how kind, how educated, how devoted to a calling, how temple-loving, how patient…⁣

We get to choose. ⁣

Not so much in a “big picture” kind of way (because I would totally choose to be awesome at every single one of those and more!)⁣

But in the day-to-day interactions. ⁣

How much am I going to push, to get outside my comfort zone, to decide to become a little bit better person instead of staying as who I am?⁣

That’s the real test of agency. ⁣

I can only imagine our Heavenly Parents watching us and seeing opportunity after opportunity pass by, and then cheering when we decide to move a step forward that day. ⁣

We aren’t going to reach the “best” in every area⁣.

But we can decide to use our agency to move that needle forward just a tick every single day. ⁣

Agency is so important to our Heavenly Father that He allows so many people to use it terribly each and every day. ⁣

It is so so so important that we all choose exactly who we want to be. ⁣

So who am I choosing to be today? Where are my priorities and my heart? ⁣

Do I like the person I’m choosing to be?⁣

Because agency gives me the power to become whoever I’d like to become. ⁣

And… I think I’d like to become just like my Savior.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Are you good or bad? first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.