This is the moment I learned that some of my colleagues and I had very different classroom management strategies. ⁣

There was one 6th grader in particular who was a challenge that year. ⁣⁣

Although I was not perfect at handling him, I had decided to take a different approach:

I talked to him a lot individually.

Year after year in the classroom, I found myself being able to connect with even the most difficult kids. ⁣

(Not that everything was amazing, but I felt like there was mutual respect and a glimpse of understanding, even despite some of their continued poor choices.)⁣

I came to learn that pulling kids aside and talking to them one-on-one was the best way to maintain that respect.

Calling kids out in front of their peers either caused shame, or it reinforced that they only got attention when they were exhibiting poor behavior. ⁣

And I didn’t want to cause either one of those outcomes.

So I found that creating unique opportunities to talk to that child one-on-one gave me the best chance to actually get my point across to them. ⁣

I think about Hiram Page. ⁣

He believed that he was receiving revelation for the entire church.

I don’t know how this all started, or if he knew at some point that this was not truly of God…

But Joseph, as directed by the Lord, gave him the benefit of the doubt. ⁣

In D&C 28:11, the Lord directed Oliver to pull Hiram aside for an individual conversation about his behavior. ⁣

“Thou shalt take thy brother, Hiram Page, between him and thee alone, and tell him that those things which he hath written from that stone are not of me and that Satan deceiveth him”.

No shaming, no name-calling, and no unnecessary attention. ⁣

Just using discretion, solving the problem with respect, and lots of love. ⁣

I’ve seen the same principle carry over as I teach youth in church, and have kids of my own. ⁣

I truly believe that most people don’t want to be bad. ⁣

If we give them the benefit of the doubt, speak to them privately with an open heart and ready to hear their side of the story, that’s when hearts are mended. ⁣

No ganging up, no mob mentality, no shame. ⁣

Just kind, loving, individual correction and connection.

I imagine, just as Jesus would.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post The tough 6th grader  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

It makes it much easier to share thoughts when I have the Spirit.

But as much fun as it is to share spiritual messages with you here, I want to point out that I am not authorized to receive revelation for any of you!

(I mean, unless one of my children or someone in my Sunday School class is reading this…)

I am so grateful that Heavenly Father wants to answer your prayers and comfort you.

And I’m so grateful that He sometimes uses the words that I write to answer those prayers.

But I think it is super important to know who we have stewardship over…

And who we don’t.

I love that the Lord is so organized when it comes to how revelation happens in this Church.

The Lord reminded Joseph and Oliver that “. . . no one shall be appointed to receive commandments and revelations in this church excepting my servant Joseph Smith, Jun., for he receiveth them even as Moses.” (D&C 28:2)

So, the prophet is the only person who can receive revelation for the entire Church.

How I serve or keep the Sabbath holy, or how I prioritize my time, will not look exactly the same as everyone else around me.

And that’s because the prophet has not told us specific details on how to do so.

And so I know that as long as I’m in line with what the prophet is teaching, I can access my own personal revelation to work out all the rest of the details.

“Most of our guidance comes from the Holy Ghost…. Guidance for the Church, as a whole, comes to the President and prophet of the Church.” – Quentin L. Cook

I have found that when I’m really clear on why God gives each of us access to revelation for various ideas or people, then I can better lean into learning the messages from God that are meant for me.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Know your stewardship first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

But I was still nervous. ⁣

It was my first time going into a real elementary school classroom as an assistant while I was earning my teaching degree. ⁣

Everyone kept saying that we should just jump in and help but… I still didn’t know what to do. ⁣

I spent way too long standing at the back of classrooms afraid that I would mess something up. ⁣

Years later, as I stood in front of 35 sixth graders and an assistant walked in to help me, it did not even cross my mind that my helper would “mess everything up”. ⁣

I just desperately needed help and was happy someone was there!

The Lord told Joseph, as Joseph was concerned about procuring the proper materials for the sacrament:⁣

“It mattereth not what ye shall eat or what ye shall drink when ye partake of the sacrament, ⁣

“if it so be that ye do it with an eye single to my glory—remembering unto the Father my body which was laid down for you, and my blood which was shed for the remission of your sins.” D&C 27:2⁣

In other words, stop worrying about all those details. ⁣

Stop worrying about not understanding every aspect of that new calling you just received. ⁣

Stop worrying about that new position at work. ⁣

Stop worrying about getting all of the parenting techniques right. ⁣

And just get your heart in the right place. ⁣

That’s what the Lord wants when we take the sacrament, more than anything else. ⁣

Are we focused on Him?⁣

Then the details will work themselves out. ⁣

Then the details of that calling, that job promotion, and that tough parenting situation will work themselves out. ⁣

That doesn’t mean, of course, that we throw the details out of the window. We don’t use candy and soda for the sacrament every week for a good reason. ⁣

But when we let go of trying to get every single detail right, and instead focus on turning our hearts and desires to what matters the most…⁣

That’s when our hearts start to change.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Nervous teaching assistant  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I can see the picture in my head, and I would look ridiculous.

I can imagine others looking at me with all my armor on.

“That looks so restrictive!”

“How do you have any fun with that stuff on?!”

“What are you preparing for? Nobody is coming.”

Similarly, to keep God’s spiritual armor on, I’m trying to learn truths, share the gospel, keep the Spirit with me, be righteous, and increase my faith daily.

It’s a lot of work to actively decide to wear it every single day.

So why do I choose to put that armor on and keep it on?

“Wherefore, lift up your hearts and rejoice, and gird up your loins, and take upon you my whole armor, that ye may be able to withstand the evil day, having done all, that ye may be able to stand.” (D&C 27:15)

It’s all more than worth it when the tough times come zooming at me all at once, and my time for preparation is suddenly gone.

When the health challenges, the huge life decisions, the sorrows, the heartbreaking events, and the overwhelming days start piling on…

I’m grateful for the heavy suit of armor I’ve built around myself.

Sure, the armor might seem restrictive to an outsider.

But when the fiery darts start to come, as they always do, boy, am I grateful for my preparation of spiritual armor.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Heavy armor first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.