I had a routine medical procedure a few years ago.
I thought about telling people beforehand, because it would have been nice to have some help, but I didn’t want to seem like I was just looking for attention.
When I got home, I was ready to eat ice cream and relax the rest of the day.
And then my visiting teacher texted me asking if she could stop by for a quick visit.
I was in no state to have someone visit me, so I told her that I just got home from the hospital and needed to relax and recover.
She responded: “What?! You are supposed to tell your visiting teachers when this happens so we can help you out and bring you treats!”
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Fast-forward a little bit and I was meeting with a sister on my ministering route.
She told me about a recent surgery she had that I had no idea about.
“Why didn’t you tell me?!” I asked.
“Oh I hate telling other people when things are going wrong. I hate asking for help,” she said.
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Fast-forward to last week as I was being admitted into the hospital for surgery.
I was exhausted and my phone was dying. I just found out that I needed surgery and would unexpectedly be staying in the hospital for a few days.
My immediate family knew, and I thought, “Ugh. No one else needs to know about this. I don’t like drawing attention to myself in this way or asking for help.”
And I think something finally clicked.
Have I ever thought that someone just wanted attention when they were sincerely asking for help? Nope.
Would it be nice to have help and prayers right now? Yes.
Do I have people who probably want to help me but just have no clue what I’m going through right now? Yes.
People can’t help if they don’t know that you need help.
And so I asked for help and prayers and support.
And it came.
I just had to ask.
And our Heavenly Father expects the same thing. He has told us time and time again in the scriptures that we must ask in order to receive.
And even when our mortal friends fail us, our loving Father will always give us exactly what we need.
He just requests that we do our part to lay aside our pride and ask.
Happy Studying!
-Cali Black
2 Responses
I AM the epitome of this. My Father was a wonderful man. He was 15 years older than my Mother. Because of WWII and explosives he worked with and detonated the very mines that would’ve killed many, his kidneys took the toll. Since I was 5, I have been in & out of Veteran’s Hospital’s and then Dr.’s offices. I loved him sooo much. I didn’t mind.
Then, with 5 children, A LOT of Dr. visits, even ER’s. All are productive adults and leaders at their jobs today. I didn’t mind.
Fast forward- me- Kimpossible as my nickname, is going at the fastest pace, working 2 jobs, to get my last through college. A car accident happens. A 16 year old T-bones my small car w/ his heavy truck.
Instantly retired. Instantly disabled. It’s been 6 years. Your Snippets put me together daily, but today, you hit the ball out of the park. You hit my biggest sore spot. I REFUSE to involve anyone, and the family knows it. Covid19 hits, and they become protective. It was nice to know the love they showed, but I am definitely ALWAYS with the attitude on refusing to tell anyone about back , shoulder procedures , appointments and I feel like it’s asking me to physically pull out my eye teeth to even go! Your Snippet today is making me rethink this. I DON’T ask for help. I WON’T! I saved your Snippet today to my notes in my phone, under my file on “Church Thoughts”. I hope you don’t mind. It’s definitely one I have to read and repeat reading.
I see both sides of this, and always have. I’m the original “I can handle this myself” girl, as well.
Recognizing that I could be a tiny source (reason) for blessings to come to others, I have tried to swallow my misgivings and at least ask for an interest in the prayers of my ministering sisters.
It keeps me out of trouble by keeping them in the loop, and if they ‘must,’ ???? they have the choice to take it further.
I know I’m always grateful to be in the loop of the families I minister to, and appreciate the chance to include them specifically in my petitions to Heavenly Father. If they let me serve them, as well, it’s a double bonus!
Thank you for your thoughts and insights, Cali!