Not gonna lie, this scripture has always been a tough one for me.
D&C 82:7 says:
“Unto that soul who sinneth shall the former sins return, saith the Lord your God.”
Whew.
That honestly does not sound very hopeful.
So if I repent for losing my patience with my kids, and then I lose my patience again, it’s like I never repented in the first place?!
AND I’ve added back in all the previous times I tried to repent for losing my patience, too?
This has never really seemed to fit in with everything else I’ve learned about Jesus Christ.
So, I want to share my personal perspective on this scripture.
President Nelson has really emphasized lately that repentance means change. To turn away from sin.
So when I raise my voice and lose my patience, I often feel sorry afterwards.
I may feel remorse, and I often feel the Spirit prompting me to want to repent.
But… if I’m not changing, then I’m not truly truly truly repenting.
I’m just feeling remorse, but I’m not changing.
So it’s not so much a vengeful God saying “Ha, you messed up again so now you have all the weight from all the times you’ve committed this sin!”
And instead more of: “Hey, you may have thought that you had really repented and changed. But you’ve still got some work to do before that one can be wiped clean.”
Does that make sense?
Now, before THAT sounds too depressing, I also think that it’s good to recognize that there are different variations or even degrees of sins.
So if I’m losing my patience in a very explosive way but I repent of that, and then the next time, I start say a few sharp things before I stop myself, then I believe I am in that repentance process!
I’m improving.
In small ways, with small steps, but I’m improving and not committing the same intensity of the sin each time.
But the sweetest reminder of all is that no matter what’s going on: whether I keep going back to the same sin even though I think I’ve “repented”, or whether I’m actually improving in little baby steps…
As long as I want the opportunity to change, the Savior will give me as many chances as I need.
Happy Studying!
-Cali Black
