With a 6, 4, and 1 year old, this also means that I’ve had to deal with infants and toddlers and all the chaos that comes from trying to get little kids to sit still for an hour, all by myself.

I’m really really really good at feeling sorry for myself.

In fact, despite AMAZING ward members, friends, and teens coming to sit by me to help with the kids, for a long time I would always shed at least a tear or two thinking about just how dang hard this is.

Other people would talk about the amazing Spirit they felt in sacrament meeting, or how they are improving their worship during the sacrament.

And I’d always laugh.

“We are just in survival mode. I’m not going to enjoy sacrament meetings right now.”

You know how sometimes you just need some tough love?

I finally got the tough love I needed from the Lord about a year ago as I sat, feeling very sorry for myself.

“Stop thinking you have it worse than everyone else. ⁣And start focusing on why you are here.

“You can still find joy.”

Woah.

Exactly what I needed.

Joy. ⁣

It is not the absence of hard things.

It is focusing on the Savior, even when enduring hard things. ⁣

I’ve learned since then that I can handle kids during sacrament meeting and be miserable OR I can handle kids and still feel pure joy. ⁣

“My dear brothers and sisters, the joy we feel has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with the focus of our lives.” – Russell M. Nelson

Come to my ward any Sunday, and you’ll still see me with some kids who really struggle in a quiet church environment (along with so many others who are willing to help).

But you’ll also see me feeling joy and praise and worship in the moments where I am able to.

It’s so tempting to want to wait for a future time to feel JOY.

But I have learned over and over that God doesn’t want us to delay joy.

And He’s so willing to help us figure out how to endure AND feel joy if we are willing to ask.

“Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy.” (2 Nephi 2:25)

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Sitting all alone first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Can you put your name in that sentence?

He did this to Paul.

“And the night following the Lord stood by him, and said, Be of good cheer, Paul.” (Acts 23:11)

Paul, as usual, was in dire circumstances with people plotting against his life from every angle. ⁣

But Paul, as usual, was still preaching of Christ and doing what he thought was right. ⁣

And that’s why the Savior told him he could be of good cheer. ⁣

Not because of Paul’s circumstances.

But because of his actions and choices!

No matter the circumstances in your life right now,

Whether they are dire, confusing, boring, joyous, frustrating, or nerve-wracking…

The Lord knows you can choose to do what is right.

I know, I know, that sounds too simple.

But none of us are predestined to fail or to turn away from God.

There is always room for service, love, personal gospel study, and keeping the commandments!

Our Savior invites us to be of good cheer because He knows we can use our agency to do something good and righteous despite our circumstances.

Our attitude and actions will always speak louder than our circumstances.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Can I find cheer in any circumstance?  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Her circumstances weren’t all that great.

Even in Samaria, she was likely an outcast.

Living with a man she wasn’t married to.

A woman with “a past”.

How might she have felt?

Alone? Forgotten? Frustrated? Guilty? Shameful? Confident?

I’m not sure.

But honestly, none of it mattered once she was converted to Jesus, the true living water.

“And many of the Samaritans of that city believed on him for the saying of the woman”. (John 4:39)

She shared Jesus, and others believed!

Here she was, changing the world and turning hearts to Jesus.

“Her past and present circumstances did not determine her future.” -Susan H. Porter

She stopped focusing on herself and instead focused on Jesus.

And that’s when the good stuff happened.

He sees us with our potential.

He knows what we can become.

And not even just “what you can become” in the eternities.

But what you can become tomorrow.

And what you can become next week.

He knows because He’s seen this radical change over and over again when people choose to truly follow Him and preach of Him.

Lepers. Liars. Adulterers. The prideful. The stubborn. The rich. The poor. The woman at the well.

When we focus on Jesus, where we’ve been doesn’t really matter.

And He can use our willing hearts and our bold testimonies to share goodness and do His work.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post The woman with the past  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Cramped conditions.

In a jail.

Terrible food.

Poor lighting.

Freezing cold.

Isn’t it tempting to consider our outside circumstances as a sign of how we are doing in life?

“How are you doing right now?”

“Terribly. Because of all these things that are going wrong…”

But Elder Cook made a wise assessment at Conference a few weeks ago:

“Joseph’s time in Liberty Jail demonstrates that adversity is not evidence of the Lord’s disfavor nor a withdrawal of His blessings.”

If we look at the physical trajectory of Joseph’s life, it doesn’t really look awesome.

A humble farmer boy. A poor young couple, accepting financial support from others. Moving to Ohio and getting a little more established. Being beat up by a mob. Reputation ruined by false rumors. Serious financial distress. Forced to move to Missouri with a hopeful promise for the future. Hope quickly being turned to conflict and fear. Arrested and stuck in a miserable jail for months.

This trajectory looks terrible, honestly.

But as with virtually everything, the Lord looks on the heart.

What was the trajectory of Joseph’s heart throughout his life?

Consistent spiritual enlightenment. Moments with the Divine. Priesthood power. Peace and certainty. Forgiveness and meekness. A growing love and concern for all. Teaching others and sharing his light. Inspired scriptures that have touched millions. Peace and comfort found in a miserable little jail cell.

Our physical circumstances have virtually no indication of how blessed we are.

It’s all about the status of the heart.

Has your heart been growing, softening, turning to the Lord throughout your life?

Then might I humbly suggest that you are living a very blessed life indeed, just like the prophet Joseph.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Joseph didn’t seem very blessed first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

My daughter Quin turned 3 last year, which means she is brand new to the primary organization this year.

Starting that very first week in January, just a few months ago, Quin’s sunbeam teacher has dropped by our home every single week with an activity and a lesson completely prepped for Quin to do.

Like, stuff is cut out, glued together, extra supplies are attached in a baggie, multiple papers of coloring sheets and lessons…

Every. Single. Week.

We had so much fun doing her “primary lesson” together at home each Sunday.

And when we started up 2nd hour a couple of weeks ago here, Quin felt right at home with her teacher and has totally fallen in love with in-person primary.

This teacher has served in many notable callings in the church throughout her life.

And with her calling as a sunbeam teacher? To a group of 10 three-year-olds?

She has planted herself.

And then she has bloomed, blessing the lives of so many others, including my own and my daughter’s.

I’ve been planted in a lot of places in my life.

Different locations, wards, callings, jobs, friend groups, schools…

Sometimes it’s hard to be planted in a circumstance I don’t really love.

But I loved that the Lord told a few different Saints in Section 57 to permanently make the move from Ohio to Missouri.

And to “be planted”.

Not looking back, wondering when this was going to end. Not envious of those who got to stay behind.

But just to be planted for the sake of being planted.

I’ve resisted being planted plenty of times.

But I’ve always been surprised at how much more at peace I feel when I decide to be planted where I’m at.

To put down my roots, and see what I can do.

And Quin’s teacher has made me think about the other direction of this, too.

I don’t just plant myself for my own peace.

I also plant myself because that’s how I can best be of service to those around me.

I can look outside myself, bloom, and bless others when I choose to be planted, no matter the circumstance.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Being planted first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Why do we all get completely different “lots”?

The sons of Mosiah all went to the Lamanite lands.

Each initially went to a different city.

Ammon fell in favor with the local ruler and ended up converting many to the gospel.

Aaron went from city to city finding only opposition, and was eventually thrown in prison and deprived of food and clothing.

Why?

Was Ammon more faithful? More deserving of a successful mission?

“As it happened, it was their lot to have fallen into the hands of a more hardened and a more stiffnecked people” – Alma 20:30

It was just their different lot.

I think about the endless varieties of “lots” that each of us is dealt in this mortal life.

There are “lots” that I envy. There are lots that I pity. There are moments of extreme gratitude for my lot. There are moments of disappointment for my lot.

But the lots that we have been given are not always a reflection of our faithfulness, righteousness, or knowledge.

Someone with an easier lot does not have their easier lot because they have greater faith than you.

And conversely, someone with a really difficult lot was not given that difficult lot because they have more faith to endure than you.

Elder Rasband gives us a small but powerful glimpse at the answer:

“The Lord knows what each of us is capable of doing and becoming.”

He knew Ammon could handle his lot. He knew Aaron could handle his.

And he knows I can handle my lot as I rely on Him.

So at the end of the day, it doesn’t do any good to over analyze WHY we have our lot. Because there might not be a simple cause or an easy answer.

But we can trust that the Lord has given us a lot that we can bear.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Our unique lots first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.