I usually kept things super high energy and busy on the first day, so that the kids didn’t have an option but to be engaged and get to know me. ⁣

And within just a few minutes, this particular student was already being defiant and apathetic. ⁣

So I made it a goal to say 5 positive, non-behavior-related comments to him each day. ⁣

⁣I complimented his shoes. I asked him what they did in P.E. today. I asked him to help me hand out pencils. He wrote a sentence about a movie when I had asked for a paragraph, and I talked to him all about my favorite parts of the movie. ⁣

He seemed surprised at first. ⁣

But he started to warm up to me. ⁣

Then, I slowly introduced private conversations about his behavior. ⁣

“Hey, I get that you were trying to be funny when you made that comment earlier, but it really derailed the entire class for a while. Could you help me out and save those kinds of comments til after class or when we have some free time?”⁣

And then, when he’d start to talk out in class again, I’d give him a little “knowing” look.⁣

He caught on. ⁣

Honestly, he was a good kid. He really struggled academically, but the behavior issues subsided to the point that they weren’t so disruptive. ⁣

I made A WHOLE LOT of mistakes while teaching. ⁣

But I never let a child leave my classroom without knowing that they were seen as a real human being, and that they were loved. ⁣

I LITERALLY thought of this scripture often, and even taught a training to my co-workers using this “saying that I once heard”…⁣

“Reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy;” (D&C 121:43⁣)

I now use this in my parenting all the time.

When the positive comments VASTLY outweigh the corrective or negative, no matter how many there are, there is a feeling of love and “I’m on your team”-ness. ⁣

God sees us as more than our mistakes, and I think He wants us to emulate that, too.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post The defiant 6th grader first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Am I doing enough?⁣

Where is my standing with God?⁣

I think about these questions a lot.⁣

Actually, I think about them a little bit less now than I used to. But they are still there. ⁣

When I look around at a messy home and a kid climbs on top of me even when I’ve asked them not to and my to-do list is longer than ever, I wonder if I’m doing well enough. ⁣

But something else I’ve noticed about these moments?⁣

I’m in self-pity. ⁣

And I’m NOT listening to the Spirit. ⁣

I’m thinking of all the ways that I’m falling short. ⁣

And I’m not trying to connect with the Divine, show gratitude, love, and grow. ⁣

On the flip side, those moments when I’m really in tune with the Spirit…⁣

When I’m feeling love and prompting and clarity and guidance…⁣

I KNOW that I’m enough. ⁣

I know that where my heart is matters most, and that it is in a good place. ⁣

I know that I will keep needing my Savior. ⁣

So sometimes I need to hear:⁣

“Let your soul be at rest concerning your spiritual standing, and resist no more my voice.” (D&C 108:2⁣)

When I am resisting the Spirit, when I think I know more about my value and worth than He does, then I feel tied down and heavy. ⁣

And when I allow myself to be comforted by that still small voice, then I feel confidence and peace. ⁣

Let your soul be at rest. ⁣

Stop resisting the comforting voice of the Spirit. ⁣

You are doing just great.

“The only opinion of us that matters is what our Heavenly Father thinks of us. Please sincerely ask Him what He thinks of you. He will love and correct but never discourage us; that is Satan’s trick.” – J. Devn Cornish

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post The Opinion That Matters  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I’m not a natural “crafter” by any means, so I was making sure I followed the instructor’s every word!

She told us the next direction, and I picked up my paint brush to do what I assumed she meant.

She quickly mentioned: “Wait, make sure you DON’T saturate it with paint! You want to keep it super light, otherwise you will ruin all the other work you just did!”

I put my paint-drenched paintbrush back in the cup and scraped off a bunch of paint.

Whew. Close call.

It is great to know what to do.

But it’s also great to know what NOT to do, right?

One of the most straightforward examples of this is found in Zephaniah 3:2 this week. Using feminine pronouns to refer to Jerusalem, he taught:

“She obeyed not the voice; she received not correction; she trusted not in the Lord; she drew not near to her God.”

Pretty straight forward, right?

Jerusalem didn’t obey the voice of the prophets. They didn’t receive correction. They didn’t trust in the Lord. And they didn’t actively find ways to draw near to their God.

And it didn’t turn out well for Jerusalem.

Knowing that fantastic nonexample, now which area can you work on with even more diligence?

Obey. Receive correction. Trust. Draw near.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post The best nonexample first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I usually kept things super high energy and busy on the first day, so that the kids didn’t have an option but to be engaged and get to know me.

And within just a few minutes, this particular student was already being defiant and apathetic.

So I made it a goal to say 5 positive, non-behavior-related comments to him each day.

I complimented his shoes. I asked him what they did in P.E. today. I asked him to help me hand out pencils. He wrote a sentence about a movie when I had asked for a paragraph, and I talked to him all about my favorite parts of the movie.

He seemed surprised at first.

But he started to warm up to me.

Then, I slowly introduced buddy-buddy conversations about his behavior.

“Hey, I get that you were trying to be funny when you made that comment earlier, but it really derailed the entire class for a while. Could you help me out and save those kinds of comments til after class or when we have some free time?”

And then, when he’d start to talk out in class again, I’d give him a little “knowing” look.

He caught on.

Honestly, he was a good kid. He really struggled academically, but the behavior issues subsided to the point that they weren’t so disruptive.

I made A WHOLE LOT of mistakes while teaching.

But I never let a child leave my classroom without knowing that they were seen as a real human being, and that they were loved.

I LITERALLY thought of this scripture often, and even taught a training to my co-workers using this “saying that I once heard”… 

“Reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy;” D&C 121:43

I now use this in my parenting all the time. When the positive comments VASTLY outweigh the corrective or negative, no matter how many there are, there is a feeling of love and “I’m on your team”-ness.

God sees us as more than our mistakes, and I think He wants us to emulate that, too.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post More than our mistakes first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.