I love teaching, I knew I connected well with my students, and I felt really fulfilled from my job. ⁣

So when I prepared to return to work after taking maternity leave with my first child, and I received a strong prompting to resign from my job at the end of the school year, I was shocked. ⁣

That wasn’t my plan. ⁣

That wasn’t what I wanted. ⁣

But I also could not deny that prompting— resign from teaching at the end of the year. ⁣

I realized that when I told people about my resignation at first, I would “blame” it all on God. ⁣

“I wanted to keep working, but I got a super strong prompting to quit so I guess that’s what I’m doing!”⁣

I had my own will.⁣

I had learned God’s will. ⁣

And I guess I was going to let His will win. ⁣

Then one day, it clicked. ⁣

God didn’t want me to grudgingly follow this prompting, blaming Him for giving up what I really wanted. ⁣

He wanted me to do it willingly. ⁣

And so I started to pray.⁣

I prayed for the desire to WANT to quit my job. ⁣

(Kind of weird, I know.)⁣

But that desire came. Pretty quickly, too. ⁣

And suddenly I felt so much more at peace about my decision. ⁣

I wasn’t “giving in” to what God wanted for my life. ⁣

My will and God’s will had become one. ⁣

We wanted the same thing, even though I wasn’t sure about the WHY yet. ⁣

“Take ye from among you an offering unto the Lord: whosoever is of a willing heart, let him bring it”. (Exodus 35:5)⁣

God doesn’t want us to come dragging our feet and blaming everything on Him. On His promptings, on His commandments. ⁣

He wants us to come and sacrifice willingly. ⁣

And I’ve learned that if I truly come to the altar of prayer with a desire to have our wills become the same, He will always help my heart get to the right place. ⁣

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Praying to want to quit  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Here’s an idea I’ve been thinking about:

We know that we are going to be judged by our works.⁣

So we start to feel like we are drowning because we just can’t seem to be consistent with our scripture study or prayer habits. ⁣

If we are going to be judged by our works, that puts a lot of pressure on us when we feel like we are constantly falling short.

But here’s what we learn in D&C 137:9.⁣

“For I, the Lord, will judge all men according to their works, according to the desire of their hearts.”⁣

That last part is the key.

Yes, we are judged according to our works, but it is “according to the desire of their hearts”.⁣

To me, this isn’t an excuse, but instead a beautiful showing of mercy.⁣

How many times have I been stopped from going to welcome a new member at church by a kid who needed me immediately?⁣

Or how many times have I been trying to read my scriptures as my eyes keep closing after a long day?⁣

God sees and understands EVERYTHING.⁣

He isn’t keeping track of our daily scripture study as tick marks for or against us.

He has just asked us to come closer to His Son, Jesus Christ, and He is happy to see any good works we choose to do to bring ourselves closer.⁣

And He also completely understands the desires of our hearts when we fall short of what we wanted to do. ⁣

He sees both. The actions, and the desires. ⁣

How merciful is our God!

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Guilt from missing scripture study  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

How am I supposed to know?⁣

I’ve had friends who deal with perfectionism who have wondered about this. I’ve had friends who deal with great anxiety and depression who have wondered about this. ⁣

I think we’ve all been here at some point. ⁣

Here’s a comforting answer I’ve encountered again and again, both in personal prayers, through messages in General Conference, and in the scriptures:⁣

Where is my heart?⁣

Because THAT is a question that I actually know the answer to. ⁣

One place the Lord reiterates this idea is in D&C 97:8:⁣

“All among them who know their hearts are honest, and are broken, and their spirits contrite, and are willing to observe their covenants by sacrifice—yea, every sacrifice which I, the Lord, shall command—they are accepted of me.”⁣

I know the state of my heart. ⁣

Do I actually yearn to learn and study from the scriptures? Or am I only waiting to see if my spouse is going to see me studying or not?⁣

Do I actually want to serve others more? Or do I feel like “things are great” and that other people are an inconvenience?⁣

Do I work on becoming more Christlike every single day? Or do I think I’ve got other more pressing issues on my to-do list?

Is my heart sincere?⁣

Is my heart honest?⁣

Is my heart broken and turned to the Lord?⁣

Is my heart yearning to keep my covenants?⁣

And when my heart isn’t… do I quickly try to repent and get back to a soft, moldable, loving heart again?⁣

…and then repent again and again and again every time I fall off the track?⁣

Then I am accepted of the Lord so far. ⁣

This doesn’t make me complacent. ⁣

In fact, it makes me feel quite the opposite. ⁣

But I think it’s important for each of us to take inventory from time to time:⁣

Where is my heart? ⁣

And as we do this under the influence of the Spirit, I believe we can get an accurate picture of our standing before the Lord.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Am I good enough? first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

But I wasn’t really feeling like it was the right time, or that I had enough resources to get it started.

But that desire was underneath everything else that I did.

And then suddenly, the opportunity presented itself, I had the courage to put myself out there BECAUSE of my desire.

Everything fell into place, and I became the co-host of the One Minute Scripture Study podcast in the beginning of 2021 (!!!) with the amazing @kristenwalkersmith.

And boy, did everything feel right. ⁣

I had held onto such a strong desire to start a podcast, and now the opportunity was presenting itself, and I felt the Spirit confirm that this was the answer I had been waiting for. ⁣

My desire to share my testimony in new ways was the prompting I needed to guide my decisions. ⁣

I’ve been really struck by David, Oliver, and Martin’s passionate pleadings this week. ⁣

I had always pictured Joseph asking God who the Three Witnesses to the gold plates should be, and then God giving these three men’s names. ⁣

But really, David, Oliver, and Martin were all moved with a desire to become one of the witnesses that they knew had been prophesied of. ⁣

And they ASKED Joseph to be witnesses to the gold plates. ⁣

Section 17 is the result of Joseph asking the Lord if these three men were acceptable for this sacred responsibility, and the Lord approving. ⁣

But these weren’t random names that the Lord happened to approve—⁣

Because they each had a burning, righteous desire to be a witness in the first place. ⁣

Our righteous desires can be promptings from the Lord on how we can use our talents to build up the kingdom of God. ⁣

The righteous, selfless, or useful things that we really want to do? ⁣

Those desires can be the first whisperings of the Spirit on what opportunities we should be on the lookout for. ⁣

And then we can ask. ⁣

We can ask to be included, we can ask to be in consideration. ⁣

We can let our righteous desires drive us to righteous action.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post I wanted to start a podcast  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I had just met a cute guy named Kyle, things were going well, but I still felt like I wanted to serve a mission. ⁣

I asked Heavenly Father over and over in prayer to point me in the right direction, and I finally heard a weighty answer:

“You can decide. Whatever you want to do.”⁣

I realized that I was going to have to make this decision and own it. ⁣

After a lot of deliberation, I solemnly but excitedly decided to forgo the mission. ⁣

I made Kyle promise me that we would serve a mission someday as a couple, because I didn’t want to miss out on the opportunity to serve. ⁣

Now, I still totally want to serve a full-time mission when I’m older, but I’m also realizing that I kind of missed the point. ⁣

We are reminded by the Lord’s revelation to Joseph Smith Sr. that “if ye have desires to serve God ye are called to the work”. (D&C 4:3)⁣

Desires = mission call. ⁣

Instead of packing up my entire life and moving across the world though, I get the crazy, scary, exciting, agency-packed honor of picking my mission.

Each of us with a desire to serve gets to create exactly how and when we serve!⁣

Maybe you have created your own custom mission call to lift up those who are having hard times around you. ⁣

Maybe you have created your own custom mission call to spread light to your coworkers every day. ⁣

Maybe your call is to teach the rising generation of the saints how to eat their vegetables and share toys and use the toilet. ⁣

Maybe your call is to organize service activities with precision and enthusiasm. ⁣

Maybe your call is to work on strengthening your own testimony for a bit before you have the opportunity to share it with other people. ⁣

The possibilities are endless, and constantly evolving, and extremely personal. ⁣

So what does your mission call look like today?⁣

How can you help build the kingdom?⁣

How can you help gather scattered Israel?⁣

What’s your custom mission call?

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Congrats on your call!  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Going from working full time to then being responsible for a tiny infant all day long really threw my mental health for a loop.

One day, my very perceptive husband came home from work and said, “I’m completely handling Quin. Leave this house. Go do something you want to do on your own.”⁣

And so I got in the car… ⁣

And I had no idea where to go.

I needed a break from my baby, but I didn’t know what I needed to replace it. ⁣

And so I leaned into the cliche, drove to Target, walked around aimlessly for a while, and then drove home. ⁣

Now since that day almost 7 years ago, I’ve come a loooong way!⁣

Just this past week during a few kid-free moments, I reorganized a toy closet, studied my scriptures in total silence, sorted my kids’ shoes, played the piano, took a much-needed nap, talked with a friend, and sang in a choir.

And there was another kid-free time this week when I scrolled social media endlessly, clicked on article after post after video, and played a game on my phone that went way longer than what I actually enjoyed, but I “just had to finish it”.

Clearly, I don’t have a total handle on my agency yet.

But I’ve come a long way in learning how to make positive, righteous, fun, and meaningful decisions with my time!⁣

And this is what fascinates me about the Lord giving Nephi power to do whatever he wished in Helaman Ch 10.⁣

The Lord trusted Nephi to ALWAYS make a righteous decision in the name of the Lord.

Nephi wasn’t going to give in to wicked decisions. But Nephi also wasn’t going to sit in indecisiveness and waste time.

“All things shall be done unto thee according to thy word, for thou shalt not ask that which is contrary to my will.” – Helaman 10:5

The Lord KNEW Nephi would make the best decisions with his abundance of agency. ⁣

That’s what I’m working towards. ⁣

Not that I always have to be “busy”. But that when I’m given “free time”, I make righteous decisions that will either rejuvenate me, bring me happiness, or push me to grow. ⁣

Because learning to use my agency wisely is the ultimate sign of trust I feel I can show my Heavenly Father.

“God wants for us a radical reorientation of our selfish and prideful impulses, the eviction of the natural man.” – Elder Patrick Kearon

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post What do you really want?  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Then repented?

And then fallen out of the habit yet again?

I certainly have.

I start to feel pretty frustrated.

But I noticed that after Alma had just finished teaching all of the people what it meant to be a member of Christ’s church by mourning with those who mourn, taking Jesus’ name upon them, keeping the commandments, and being baptized, this is what the people did and said:

“. . .they clapped their hands for joy, and exclaimed: This is the desire of our hearts.” (Mosiah 18:11)

I can pretty much guarantee that while these people were amazing, they weren’t perfect.

I’m sure they didn’t hear Alma preach and immediately keep every commandment with exactness afterward.

They were human, with human tendencies.

But do you know what they got right?

They had a perfect DESIRE!

They DESIRED to be baptized.

They DESIRED to make covenants.

They DESIRED to serve the people around them.

So even when we aren’t perfect with prayer (or whatever your habitual sin may be)…

Do we desire to pray every day?

Do we keep trying every single time we forget or mess up?

Do we sincerely want to do better?

Do we desire to commune with God more and more?

If we have a good desire to be righteous, then we are on the right track.

“We are going to be blessed for our desire to do good, even as we actually strive to be so.” – Jeffrey R. Holland

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Messing up again  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

My water bottle comes wherever I go!

We live in a two-story home and whenever I’m ready to transition up or downstairs, my kids always make sure I have my water and my phone.

My youngest is actually very concerned when I don’t have my water bottle right next to me, and will go to find it and bring it to me. It’s cute.

So the analogy that Jesus uses here really resonates with me:

“I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life freely.” (Revelation 21:6)

How long can I go without reconnecting with my Savior? ⁣

Longer than I can go without a drink of water?⁣

That’s a piercing question for me. ⁣

I want the Savior’s loving and peaceful influence in my life…

But do I always thirst for it?

I’m working on building that desire up on a consistent basis. ⁣

Instead of forgetting or avoiding prayers or scriptures…

I want to feel a longing and a necessity to not go without them.

Just as I wouldn’t go to bed without my water. ⁣

Some days I’m there.

But some days I’m not. ⁣

He promises that He will give the water to me FREELY once I desire it. ⁣

But I have to ask for it.

I have to want it in the same way I would want to quench my thirst. ⁣

I am grateful for a Savior who gives me what I desire. ⁣

But that means I have to work on what my desires really are.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Always with my water bottle  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I love teaching, I knew I connected well with my students, and I felt really fulfilled from my job.

So when I prepared to return to work after taking maternity leave with my first child, and I received a strong prompting to resign from my job at the end of the school year, I was shocked.

That wasn’t my plan.

That wasn’t what I wanted.

But I also could not deny that prompting— resign from teaching at the end of the year.

I realized that when I told people about my resignation at first, I would “blame” it all on God.

“I wanted to keep working, but I got a super strong prompting to quit so I guess that’s what I’m doing!”

I had my own will.

I had learned God’s will.

And I guess I was going to let His will win.

Then one day, it clicked.

God didn’t want me to grudgingly follow this prompting, blaming Him for giving up what I really wanted.

He wanted me to do it willingly.

And so I started to pray.

I prayed for the desire to WANT to quit my job.

(Kind of weird, I know.)

But that desire came. Pretty quickly, too.

And suddenly I felt so much more at peace about my decision.

I wasn’t “giving in” to what God wanted for my life.

My will and God’s will had become one.

We wanted the same thing, even though I wasn’t sure about the WHY yet.

“Take ye from among you an offering unto the Lord: whosoever is of a willing heart, let him bring it”. (Exodus 35:5)

God doesn’t want us to come dragging our feet and blaming everything on Him. On His promptings, on His commandments.

He wants us to come and sacrifice willingly.

And I’ve learned that if I truly come to the altar of prayer with a desire to have our wills become the same, He will always help my heart get to the right place.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post The will to quit my job first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I’ve noticed that there are times when I start to get really down on myself for how often I’m making the same mistakes over and over.

But I can feel the Spirit whisper that I am facing the right direction.

I feel remorse when I sin.

I want to become better.

I don’t give up on trying to become more Christlike.

Sure, I might be taking steps forward and backward.

But I am still facing the Savior.

One thing that I noticed about the Israelites though, is that they seemed to have made some pretty big mistakes while they were waiting for Moses on the mountain.

Breaking covenants, not keeping commandments, those are all not super awesome things to do.

But even more concerning is what we learn in Exodus 32:8:

“They have turned aside quickly out of the way which I commanded them”.

They were facing the wrong direction.

They needed a whole lot of support and intervention before their hearts desired repentance. Before they desired to try to do better.

The Lord knew what kind of commandments and priesthood they needed, what kind of temple worship they needed, what kind of ordinances and covenants they needed in order to keep their hearts facing toward Him.

We will all take plenty of steps both forward and backward along the path back to eternal life.

But when we make those mistakes, what are our desires afterward?

Do we want to keep trying to go back to that comfortable sin? Do we want to be sneaky so others don’t notice? Do we want to find more situations to do the same thing?

Or do we desire to do better?

Even if it takes an entire lifetime filled with sinning and repenting, a desire to repent shows us which way we truly face.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Which way do you face?  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.