I brought it home, and my parents said they wouldn’t give permission — it was a movie with content they didn’t want me watching at 13 years old.

So when all my friends got ready to watch the movie for three class periods in a row, I went to the office and did an alternative activity.

And honestly?

I didn’t mind.

I was used to being different.

There had already been many times in my life where I had made decisions, or my parents had held firm on decisions, that differed from what everyone else was doing.

And also no one in my class gave me any grief about needing to leave (to my face at least!), my friends were still my friends, I was semi-cool and felt included…

It was all good.

One of my favorite minor effects of being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is that I have gotten very used to NOT doing what everyone else is doing.

I naturally stood out, especially where I grew up, where our religion was a small minority.

From what I chose to wear at my prom, to not attending that Sunday pool party, to sending out wedding invites when my friends from back home thought I was a “child bride”…

I’ve grown comfortable with being different than the world.

The Israelites had a problem:

They really WANTED to be like everyone else.

Each nation has a king who rules them, takes responsibility, and leads them in battle?!

We want that, too!

“That we also may be like all the nations; and that our king may judge us, and go out before us, and fight our battles.” (1 Samuel 8:20)

They weren’t comfortable with being different.

But even deeper than that, they didn’t trust that the Lord’s counsel to NOT have a king outweighed the discomfort of being different from everyone else.

Because when I changed the song on the radio while driving my friends around in high school, it wasn’t for the sake of being different —

It was because I truly believed I didn’t want to invite offensive and inappropriate words and ideas into my mind, which could offend the Spirit.

Being different can be tough — at the end of the day, we all long to feel like we belong and matter in some sort of community.

And if the community we desire to belong to more than anything else is a community of disciples of Christ, then it becomes a lot easier to stand alone, understanding that we are truly not alone when we walk with Him.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Not allowed to watch the movie first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Why can’t we just do our own thing and worry about our personal salvation?⁣

I think it’s important to be good examples in order to attract others to the gospel.

We can be the light on the hill.

We can talk about the joy and peace that permeates, even in the tough times.

We want to prove that being a follower of Christ actually changes who we are for the better.

⁣And the biggest lesson I’ve learned as I’ve tried to be a good example, is that it’s important to learn how to be comfortable being different!

Paul taught: “. . . Be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.” (1 Timothy 4:12)

If we are going to choose to be different in

the words we say,

our topics of conversation,

the way we serve,

the sensitivity of our spirits,

the faith we develop,

and the purity of our minds,

then we are choosing to stick out amongst the rest of the world.

Are we okay being different and peculiar?

Jesus sure was different when He walked on the earth.

He stood out.

He was peculiar and unique in the things He said and the way He acted.

It’s good to get comfortable with being a bit different.

And if we stick out a bit by being a believer of Christ, we are in good company.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Be an example of the believers first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

There are times when I definitely enjoy standing out.

On my graduation day, at a birthday party, my baby shower…

But there are other times that I absolutely do not want to stand out.

Usually when I’m in a large group setting or I don’t know anyone or I feel awkward.

But I’ve learned that when we stick to gospel principles, we naturally stand out.

In fact, our current prophet has encouraged this!

“Embrace being different!” -President Nelson

Do you think it was difficult for Daniel and his brethren to stand out?

I’m sure it was.

It’s easy to romanticize and distance ourselves from this well-known story.

But I bet it wasn’t simple.

When they refused to eat or drink what the other boys were eating and drinking, I bet they got made fun of.

I bet they were ostracized.

I bet people talked about them behind their backs.

It is not fun to stand out in this way.

But what was the end result?

“Among them all was found none like Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah”. (Daniel 1:19)

There was no one else like them!

I’m sure that was difficult sometimes to stand out.

But in the end, they stood out in the best way possible.

And they certainly stood out to their Heavenly Father.

For better or for worse, we are going to stand out when we really love the Lord and stick to what He has taught us.

Sometimes the attention feels good, like when your coworker wants to know why you always seem so happy or when someone confides in you because you are always so kind.

But other times, standing out isn’t so naturally comfortable.

Embrace it. Love it. Find confidence in it.

Because even though we may stand out in awkward ways, we will never stand alone.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Stand out  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

They have different jobs and roles to fulfill, but they are united in Their purpose. 

And that’s what makes this whole eternal salvation thing possible. 

We have One who is the loving Father of our spirits, we have One who atoned for our sins and showed the example, and we have One who carries messages to our heart and mind. 

Same purpose. Different jobs.

What a beautiful pattern for us to follow here on earth!

In our ward families, in our jobs, in many organizations, this is a great pattern – to focus on the unity of purpose while fulfilling different jobs.

But my favorite example of this is in marriage. 

It’s super easy to build up resentment in marriage. 

Resentment because it’s pretty impossible for two people to do exactly the same things all of the time and have a functioning household or life. 

Things are unfair all the time. 

I remember right after we got married, Kyle and I were both coming home from long days at work/school, and he asked me, “What do you have planned for dinner tonight?” My response was, “What do YOU have planned for dinner tonight?”

We hadn’t communicated yet about who would be in charge of dinners, and I certainly wasn’t going to bring on the resentment of trying to do a task I secretly despise. 

But then we talked about it. We figured it out. And it’s changed over the years as our lives have changed.

(For what it’s worth, he 100% plans all of our dinners right now and just tells me where to find the recipe. He’s the best. It’s also his birthday today, so wish him a Happy Birthday below!)

But that’s the beauty about unity. We can be united in our purpose and find different ways to get the messy jobs of life done. 

It’s not “fair”. It will never be “fair” if we are keeping score. 

“Different” doesn’t have to come with rankings. And “different” can change all of the time. Different is okay, and in fact, necessary. 

But with communication, love, and respect, we can find peace in the different job titles that we currently wear.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Fighting resentment in marriage first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.