I can still distinctly remember her cries waking me up shortly after I had just fallen asleep.

My immediate instinct was to soothe her in any way possible in her bassinet.

I put my hand on her chest.

I fished around for her pacifier and tried to put that in her mouth.⁣

And then quite often, I’d realize she wasn’t going back to sleep, and was ready to eat.⁣

I’d pull my body up from the comfy sheets, prop up my pillows, pull her from her bassinet, and feed her for a half hour in the dark. ⁣

Motherhood is a sacrifice.

A sacrifice of my body. My comfort. My sleep. My time. My mental resources. ⁣

But this sacrifice has refined me into a more selfless, more kind, more fulfilled, and hopefully more Christlike person. ⁣

Could I ever ignore or forget my baby’s cries in the middle of the night?

It’s hard to even imagine. ⁣

And yet, our Savior will forget us even less than a mother and her newborn child.

“For can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? Yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee, O house of Israel.” (1 Nephi 21:15)

He has given us a greater sacrifice than even a mother who has birthed a child.

His body was broken for us. His emotional energy was depleted for us. His mortal life was ended for us. ⁣

He has sacrificed so much for us, that He could never forget us. ⁣

He has graven us upon the palms of His hands. ⁣

Do we remember that we can cry out to Him?

Do we trust that He really will respond every time in exactly the way that we need?

Do we know that His sacrifice for us forges a connection that can never be lost?⁣

The Lord will not forget us. He has never. And He will never. ⁣

He is aware of our every action and thought and move. He knows when we are in pain. He knows when we are confused. He knows when we just need a break. ⁣

All we need to do is trust that He really is there.

At 1:00 am, or whenever we need Him, He is there.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Sleepless nights  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

“You’ll love it when you can have a conversation with him!”

“Once she starts eating solids, things will be easier.”

“It will be nice when they aren’t all in car seats anymore!”

“Someday they’ll sleep in all day long and you’ll be the one waking them up!”

Motherhood sure bombards you with a lot of comments that embody the idea of “just you wait”.

Waiting for things to get easier.

Other times it’s waiting for things to get harder.

But it’s about something in the future.

I’m waiting for things to get easier.

And I’m waiting for things to get more difficult.

“Just wait til they are a teenager…”

I had a wise friend help me see how damaging all of that thinking can be.

She told me that there’s a little bit hard and a little bit easy about every stage of life and that she plans to enjoy it all.

“To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose”. (Ecclesiastes 3:1)

This is the time of my life where I can’t leave the house for more than 3 hours without having previously pumped milk for my baby.

And this is the time of my life where I get to cuddle the three cutest kids as much as I want.

This is the time of my life where I turn down speaking engagements that require me to travel long distances.

And this is the time of my life where I get to write about the scriptures on my phone while my kids sleep.

This is the time of my life where I can’t serve or volunteer for everything that comes my way.

And this is the time of my life where I get to teach my kids how to pray and laugh at the things they decide to include.

“Life isn’t just to ‘live through.’ We are to experience each moment, enjoy it, and learn from it.” Marty Halversen

Life is always a little bit easy and a little bit hard.

And I’m learning to embrace it all.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Times and seasons first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

The word “schedule” is pretty meaningless.

Infants cry when they want. Sleep when they want. Have messy blowouts when they want.

I have so little control over a lot of details in my life right now!

It’s fine.

I know it gets better in some ways.

And crazier in others.

But even when I’m super tired and a hot mess, I’ve taken comfort in what I can control.

I can choose Jesus.

“Choose you this day whom ye will serve”. (Joshua 24:15)

I can choose to still pray.

I can choose to still scroll through some scriptures as I’m falling asleep.

I can choose to react with love and all the patience I can muster.

And I can also choose to recognize that raising my little baby, responding to her constant needs, is a huge way of serving the Lord, too.

I am choosing to raise this beautiful child of God.

I’m choosing to make personal sacrifices to raise her and give her what she needs.

Basically, I’m choosing to serve God each day by embracing the chaos.

It’s what I’m giving Him right now.

“Choosing the Lord” looks different to everyone in different stages of life.

But the choice will always be there— in fact, our Savior suffered to endure that the choice would always be there.

How have you chosen Jesus today?

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Choose ye this day first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

You are surrounded by little people all day, and yet you can feel pretty lonely.

I have felt this, a lot.

I’ve also had other solitary moments in my life where I may have looked fine, or been surrounded by friends, but I still felt all alone.

Have you felt like this before? Or maybe, do you feel it right now?

Attending school, being given certain callings… these things can lead us to feel like we are in a solitary, draining place.

And honestly, it’s hard to feel like I can give service when I’m feeling drained and alone.

I don’t feel like getting out there and being proactive and doing things.

But the Savior is real.

He can take my solitary place and give it the nutrition that it needs.

To give it the light that it needs to still grow, even if it’s all alone.

To recognize that even when I feel completely drained, the Savior makes it possible for me to still give.

And not just give, but to be overflowing with ABUNDANCE.

“Therefore, will I not make solitary places to bud and to blossom, and to bring forth in abundance? saith the Lord.” D&C 117:7

He sees you in your lonely place.

But he doesn’t want you to stay there.

He wants to see you blossom and bring forth abundance, even when it seems impossible.

Because honestly, impossible is what Jesus does.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Abundance from Nothing first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Like… I didn’t know what I was supposed to do with this baby!

Wasn’t someone going to make sure she was being fed and tighten up her swaddles when they fell apart?!

Giving birth sure didn’t make me feel qualified to be a mother.

Talk about a trusting Heavenly Father right?!

My daughter is as much His daughter as I am, and yet I’ve been given the huge blessing of being her mother here on earth.

I have been given solemn stewardship over this daughter of God for the next little bit.

She is His, but He is giving me an opportunity to show what kind of a steward I can be.

Some stewardships, such as parenting, are pretty long-term.

But other stewardships, such as callings we receive or possessions that we own, are much more temporary.

And yet… everything is His.

The Lord taught in D&C 104:57: “But, verily I say unto you, I have appointed unto you to be stewards over mine house, even stewards indeed.”

We’ve all been appointed a little bit of stewardship over a corner of God’s house.

Stewardship does not mean ownership, but instead implies a solemn loan in which we get to show our responsibility, maturity, and agency.

Today, I invite you to reflect on the people and things that you currently have stewardship over.

Am I being a good steward?

Not a perfect steward, but a good one who is trying my best to take care of the things that are His?

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Am I a good steward? first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I started having a conversation with someone and I really wanted to know how she was doing…

And then my little boy crawled out of sight and I had to run after him.

I saw a new family at our linger longer after church that I wanted to get to know better.

And every single time I started walking their way, one of my kids desperately needed my urgent attention. And then the family got up and left.

I started catching up with another friend I hadn’t seen in a while.

And then I had to go stop by kid who was trying to climb all over the organ in the chapel.

I wanted to be friendly. I wanted to meet new people. To connect. To show love.

And my kids kept distracting me and throwing obstacle after obstacle my way.

I honestly left church feeling pretty bummed out.

I kept praying for a new perspective and some clarity all afternoon.

Eventually, the spirit brought two things to my mind.

First, I remembered the different uplifting interactions I had with people BECAUSE my kids were being a little crazy.

New friendships being made. Other people serving ME.

And secondly, the spirit brought to my mind this scripture, that I had already been pondering as one of my favorites from this Come, Follow Me week:

“Out of small things proceedeth that which is great.” D&C 64:33

I felt like I missed out on some great things at church yesterday.

Because I was instead stuck doing a bunch of little, insignificant things.

Pulling out a Jesus book to distract, opening another pack of fruit snacks, pulling a hand away from a cord, picking up the kid trying to lick the A/C vent (again), picking up the goldfish, talking out of a meltdown, teaching about reverence in the chapel that seemed to go in one ear and out the other…

I did a lot of small things.

But I did them for two little kids that I love. Because they are so so so little. And right now, they need the fruit snacks. They need the carrying. They need the teaching. They need the constant attention.

And all of these small, little things…

Comes all the REALLY great stuff.

Seriously, these kids are going to be amazing grownups. I can tell already.

And because I will become greater as I step into my role as their mother.

Parenthood is doing a lot of the small stuff. The diaper changes, wiping up the spill, giving a hug, over and over.

Small stuff. All day, every day.

But it’s out of these small things.

The songs sung during the diaper change, the invitation to help mommy clean up the spill, the loving smile and little tickle when I give the hug.

Out of these small things proceedeth that which is great.

Artwork by Megan Lindsey, @huesandbluesart

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Small things at church first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.