Anytime we sat down at the table, no matter what time of day it was, he insisted that we pray first. 

Sitting down to play a game? Pray first.

Sitting down to eat a snack? Pray first.

Sitting down just to sit down? Pray first.

But as he grew older, he started to ask many questions about “why” we do what we do.

His insisting on praying turned into asking WHY we always pray before we eat a meal together.

As we’ve worked to develop our family habits of praying and reading the scriptures together, I’ve started trying to be more conscious of how I talk about these habits. ⁣

Instead of: “It’s time to read and pray before we go to bed”

I’ve been trying to do more: “It’s time to read scriptures so we can learn more about Jesus!” ⁣

When the Lord taught the Israelites about this new Passover ordinance, He warned them that their children would ask about it.

“Your children shall say unto you, What mean ye by this service?” (Exodus 12:26)

The Lord wanted His people to teach their children WHY they repeated this Passover ordinance and celebration. ⁣

It can be so easy to get caught up in just trying to get our kids to cooperate in saying prayers, in staying quiet at church, in paying tithing, in setting goals, in serving and showing kindness…⁣

But the Lord wants us to also teach the WHY. ⁣

Why do YOU try to be reverent at church? Why do YOU say prayers, and pay tithing, and attend the temple?⁣

When we can share our own testimonies and our own “why”s with our kids, we are sharing our hearts and truly teaching our values in authentic ways.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Mom, why are we praying?! first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I have personally learned it’s actually much more difficult to ask questions to God in prayer than we often think it is. ⁣

It’s like the classic example of Nephi asking Laman and Lemuel: “Have ye inquired of the Lord?”⁣

And the two brothers answer with: “We have not; for the Lord maketh no such thing known unto us.” (1 Nephi 15:8-9⁣)

When a question pops into our brain, it can be tempting to think that the Lord will let us know the answer if that is His will. ⁣

But we learn time and time again from the examples of prophets and other faithful saints that we have to ASK.

And it takes a lot of faith to ask because that means we are expecting a response. ⁣

We are expecting a response and then we are going to actually act on the answer, whatever direction it takes us. ⁣

This is one reason I love these question-and-answer sections in the Doctrine and Covenants this year. ⁣

Section 113 is a lovely example of someone reading the scriptures, feeing confused… and then doing something about it!⁣

Taking the time to formally write out questions, taking them to the Lord in prayer, and then expecting responses, which vary in their length and clarity. ⁣

Everyone has questions. ⁣

Whether they are big, foundational questions, or smaller “I don’t understand what this means” questions, they matter to the Lord. ⁣

He will send His spirit to teach us truth. ⁣

But first… we have to ask.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Faith to ask questions  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

When not all of my questions or requests are actually answered?⁣

And…⁣

How am I supposed to make my prayers more about aligning with God’s will…

Instead of just listing off my thanks and requests?⁣

2 tricky questions with I think the same exact answer.

The Lord teaches pretty succinctly in D&C 46:30:⁣

“He that asketh in the Spirit asketh according to the will of God; wherefore it is done even as he asketh.”⁣

The Lord is teaching specifically about requesting more spiritual gifts, but I think this applies perfectly to any request we have of Him. ⁣

The answer to both of my questions is the presence of the Spirit. ⁣

When I have the Spirit with me as I pray, I know what to pray for. ⁣

I had a very powerful moment in my life where I went to pray for someone’s healing, but I suddenly knew NOT to pray for healing, and to pray for comfort of loved ones instead. ⁣

And I had a very powerful moment in my life where I went to pray to accept the outcome, no matter what it was, but I suddenly knew that I SHOULD pray and request healing. ⁣

It’s hard to explain. ⁣

It’s those quiet whisperings of the Spirit that lead me toward asking the right question, and confirming in my heart that I am knocking on the right door. ⁣

But when I’m saying prayers without requesting the presence of the Spirit, or not living worthily to invite His presence, then I end up asking questions that aren’t ready to be answered yet. ⁣

It all comes back to the Sacrament for me. ⁣

That is such a serious covenant that I renew each week. ⁣

I always want His Spirit to be with me. ⁣

And so I try to always remember Him and keep His commandments. ⁣

My prayers have night-and-day differences when I have the Spirit with me.

And one of the biggest blessings is that I know what to pray for. ⁣

My will starts to be swallowed up in the Father’s will. ⁣

And the spiritual gifts that I request and seek after are given to me as I work hard to obtain them. ⁣

I knock, and it’s opened.

Because I have the Spirit with me to let me know I’m at the right door.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Am I knocking at the right door? first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

For personal prayers?

I went years without doing this.

Honestly, I didn’t think it was that big of a deal.

Until I started hearing people mention it a lot more.

Encouragements to pray vocally.

So… I tried it.

And it felt really awkward at first.

I had to slow my thoughts down more to say the words out loud instead of just jumping through them in my mind.

I had to have intention.

I had to say things out loud that I didn’t usually say out loud, like admitting to my weaknesses and sins for the day, sincerely praying for others, and asking questions.

But by the end of that first prayer, I could already tell this was going to be transformative.

And now anytime that I’m all alone in my room…

I pray out loud.

The Lord said:

“I command thee that thou shalt pray vocally as well as in thy heart”. – (D&C 19:28)

“Our prayers ought to be vocal when we have the privacy to so offer them.” – Jeffrey R. Holland

What has your experience been with praying vocally?

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Pray vocally first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I tried it once at a mall— and I remember how weirdly hard it was to get started!

But then I figured it out and it was pretty easy.

I felt cool.

(Obviously I don’t rebel much in my life.)

I’ve heard it said though that our relationship with God is like trying to walk up an escalator that is moving down.

Meaning— it takes EFFORT.

It’s not passive.

AND if we stop making any effort, we aren’t just halting our progression—we are actually moving away from God.

What about if we stop moving completely?

The Lord reminds us what is waiting for us at the bottom of that escalator if we stop trying to connect with the divine:

“Pray always, that you may come off conqueror;

“yea, that you may conquer Satan,

“and that you may escape the hands of the servants of Satan that do uphold his work.” (D&C 10:5)

It’s the adversary and those who “uphold his work.”

I definitely don’t want to fall down there!

So, how do I conquer Satan?

How do I work my way up the escalator so I can feel God’s love and gain more peace if in my life?

“Pray always.”

Prayer is not just a checklist item each day.

When I pray always, I find that I am being kept away from the adversary.

Temptations don’t seem as difficult to resist.

I can more clearly see people who are just trying to drag me down.

I recognize the little lies that he tries to whisper to me.

These are blessings I desperately want in my life.

So I’m going to keep praying as much as I can and keep moving up that escalator, closer and closer to God!

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Up the escalator first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

Martin had felt a pull to this young Joseph, and wanted to help him financially. ⁣

He went on a journey of “proof” to find professors in New York who could verify the ancient letters. ⁣

He felt like he needed to volunteer to scribe for Joseph. ⁣

And his wife thought this was all one big deception. ⁣

And the two of them temporarily moving into the Smith home for the translation just made things worse. ⁣

Lucy was skeptical, sneaky, and just a not-so-great guest. ⁣

And so Martin had an idea after his wife returned back home:⁣

If he could just show her some of these beautiful messages that he had been writing down, he could change her mind toward this whole operation, and ultimately, restore his image in her eyes. ⁣

But the Lord said no. ⁣

But… did the Lord really understand how embarrassing this might be for Martin to continue helping Joseph while his wife spiraled?

Did the Lord get that people were making fun of Martin for giving Joseph money?⁣

Did the Lord know that Martin’s life would be a whole lot harder if there wasn’t any proof?⁣

Of course the Lord did. ⁣

Because the Lord asks us to do really hard things. ⁣

He asks us to put Him above all. ⁣

Above being popular. Above being stylish. Above being funny. Above being well-respected. Above being rich. Above having power. ⁣

Above being liked. ⁣

Above everything we often crave. ⁣

And it’s easier said than done. ⁣

But it’s the most important choice we learn to make –

Out of the Lord or our peers, who do we want to “save face” with more? ⁣

Whose opinion matters more right now?

“While it certainly takes courage to face perils, the true badge of courage is overcoming the fear of men.” – Lynn G. Robbins

“You should not have feared man more than God.” (D&C 3:7)

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post  Lucy and Martin  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

They were struggling for their lives. They were being slaughtered. Their peace was being destroyed. ⁣

And yet they didn’t call on God for help. ⁣

“They… did struggle for their lives without calling upon that Being who created them.” (Mormon 5:2)⁣

How could they not even ASK for help when they were struggling so much?! ⁣

Just a few weeks ago, I hit a real “low” when it came to my time management. ⁣

I have a lot going on, but I was dropping every single ball instead of at least keeping a few in the air. ⁣

I actually enjoy learning about time management and all sorts of productivity hacks, so I dug into research mode. ⁣

I was trying out new strategies, failing, learning more, trying it out, dropping all the balls again…⁣

I had this weird story in my head that Heavenly Father was really disappointed in me that I couldn’t handle everything right now, and that He needed me to use my own agency to figure it out. ⁣

Not because I felt that prompting from Him, but because I don’t enjoy asking for help and this was the story I had come up with. ⁣

I was struggling, and I wasn’t calling upon my God for any help. ⁣

I fall into this trap ALL OF THE TIME. ⁣

And then, finally, my scripture study reminded me of the importance of prayer. ⁣

I thought, “Maybe I should ask Him for help.”⁣

And bam. ⁣

Inspiration came. Doors were opened. My mindset changed. ⁣

So why do we do this to ourselves?!⁣

We struggle. With overwhelm. With spirituality. With time management. With grief. ⁣With real problems.

And sometimes we just don’t call upon the One who created us. ⁣

Maybe we feel like He is disappointed in us for needing help. ⁣

But He is ready and waiting. ⁣

He wants us to ask for help. ⁣

Instead of prayers filled with only gratitude and normal blessing requests, we can include sincere pleas for help. ⁣

It is okay to ask for help from the divine Being who wants to help us come Home.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Asking for help  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I had prayed. I had done my research. I had written out pros and cons lists. I had talked with friends. ⁣

And I still had no clue which school to pick. ⁣

I kept praying.⁣

And still, I felt nothing. ⁣

Why wasn’t I getting the direction I was looking for? ⁣

I spent all summer thinking, delaying the final decision until the final deadline. ⁣

Still with no heavenly answer…

I finally just picked a school.

And it turned into a beautiful experience that was perfect with me, led me to amazing friends, and gave me great academic opportunities. ⁣

“Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good” (Alma 37:37).

So why hadn’t I been directed in the way I expected?

I have had countless times when I HAVE felt guided and directed by Heavenly Father in decisions I have made. ⁣

But I’ve also had a few of these experiences, where I look to Heaven and don’t hear anything. ⁣

Here’s what I think:

Being unmistakably directed in 100% of my actions would remove the need for agency and would stifle my growth.

Heavenly Father knew that I needed to “own” my school decision 100%. ⁣

And He trusted ME to make that decision all on my own. ⁣

He trusted me to study, ask, ponder, research, contemplate, and then decide. All by myself.

During that long decision-less summer, I think He was teaching me a totally different but more valuable lesson.

He knew I would figure out the school predicament.

But He knew I would need to learn the skill of making decisions quickly and with confidence by suffering through the painstaking opposite.

And so even when I didn’t think He was directing me, He was directing me for the greater good by allowing me to teach myself the lesson I had no clue I was learning. ⁣

He is there. He is listening. ⁣

Sometimes He needs to intervene and tell me what to do. Sometimes He wants to give me a nudge in the right direction. ⁣

And sometimes, He wants me to learn that I can trust myself and still learn the lessons He has directed for me.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post The long summer  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

It’s a question we’ve all asked.

While I think pride is absolutely a big factor, Alma tells Helaman about one big sin to look out for:⁣

“. . . do not let us be slothful because of the easiness of the way.” (Alma 37:46)

Saying my prayers every day should be something pretty easy. ⁣

It’s just a few minutes in the morning, a few minutes at night, and all I need to do is turn my attention to God for a bit. ⁣

That sounds so simple!⁣

And yet, those slothful temptations seem to pile on. ⁣

”I’m too tired right now – I’ll do it later.”⁣

“I can’t focus right now.”⁣

“It’s not that big of a deal to skip it tonight.”⁣

And slowly, I’ve built up an arsenal of excuses for not doing the most simple thing I can do–

A task that involves zero supplies and only my mind communing with God for a few short minutes. ⁣

When it is so easy to do something that will build up our testimony, strengthen our connection with God, bring our families closer together…

Then it is also really easy to not do it. ⁣

So I think it’s good to reflect.

What slothful excuses are keeping me from doing the simple things right now?

And when I start to break down that wall of excuses, I realize yet again how simple it is to connect with heaven.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Too tired to pray  first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

I went to my closet to get dressed. . .

And the blouse that I wanted was curled up in a ball on the floor, stinky, wrinkled beyond repair, and unwearable.

Panic set in.

In my mind this was a disaster.

I was nervous enough for the job interview, and now my planned outfit wasn’t going to work out?!

Immediately, I folded my arms and said a quick prayer. ⁣

I asked for comfort to calm my heart, and for me to figure out what to do next.

I looked at my closet, found a new shirt I felt confident about, and I was in my car just a few minutes later. ⁣

As I was driving to the interview, I was praying that I would interview well, that I would get the job if it was His will. . .

And then I laughed a bit. ⁣

Had I really just prayed about what shirt I was wearing?⁣!

This is my favorite thing that I’ve learned about my loving Father in Heaven:

There’s nothing too big AND nothing too small for Him to care about. ⁣

Alma testified, “I have been supported under trials and troubles of every kind.” (Alma 36:27)

Every single kind of trouble.

He’ll support us through the heartbreaking tragedies. The big stuff.

But He’ll also support us when we can’t find the shirt we wanted to wear.

He’ll support us when we don’t know how to respond to some contention in our calling.

He’ll support us when we are sad to miss out on something we were excited for.

He’ll support us when we forget something that causes a little inconvenience.

God really will support us through every single kind of trial and trouble that we can have.

We just need to remember to actually turn to Him whenever any sort of trouble sets in.

If it matters to you, it matters to Him.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post The wrinkled shirt first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.