I was in high school.

And someone told me about what someone else was saying.

And boy, did that make me mad.

Why was she saying bad things about me that weren’t even true?!

I started telling everyone about how rude she was.

How unfair she was.

How she didn’t understand my side of things.

Then, one day, it clicked.

I was now talking about HER behind her back!

When it was all said and done, this acquaintance said one poor thing about me to a handful of people.

And yet, I spent weeks saying poor things about this person to even more people.

The Lord taught Thomas B. Marsh some personal lessons.

Including that he should “. . . revile not against those that revile.”(D&C 31:9)

“Revile” means to criticize in an angry or abusive way.

Someone yelling at me, being rude to me, leaving me out, or criticizing me may hurt when it happens.

But it doesn’t mean that I yell, criticize, become rude, or intentionally leave others out in return.

I’ve been on a lifelong journey to try to control my emotions maturely, just as the Lord taught Thomas in this verse.

Instead, I try to focus on living the second great commandment:

Loving my neighbor as myself, completely independent of other people’s actions.

“We move toward loving our adversaries when we avoid anger and hostility toward those with whom we disagree.” – Pres Oaks

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Behind my back first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.

And boy, did that make me mad.

I started telling this story of someone gossiping about me over and over to all of my friends.

I told them how rude she was being, how unfair, how she didn’t understand my side of things…

Until it clicked one day that I was now the one talking about HER behind her back all the time!

When it was all said and done, I think this acquaintance said one poor thing about me to a handful of people.

And yet, I spent weeks saying poor things about this person to even more people.

In Doctrine and Covenants 31:9, the Lord is teaching Thomas B. Marsh some personal lessons.

Thomas is told to “revile not against those that revile”.

“Revile” means to criticize in an angry or abusive way.

In other words, don’t criticize the people who are criticizing you.

I’ve been on a lifelong journey to try to control my emotions in a mature way, just as Thomas was taught in this verse.

Someone yelling at me, being rude to me, leaving me out, criticizing me… it may hurt when it happens.

And it means that I probably am not going to hang out around them very much in the future.

We can set boundaries.

That girl in high school never became my good friend.

But it doesn’t mean that I yell, criticize, become rude, or intentionally leave others out in return.

Instead, I focus on living the second great commandment and loving my neighbor as myself, completely regardless of other people’s actions.

The world has enough people who revile, and who feel justified in their reviling.

So I’m going to choose love.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Reviling against reviling first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.