P.S. If you’ve got young kids, check out my tips here, and be sure to read my full Survival Guide with tons of advice HERE!

I seriously love working with teenagers. I got my degree in Elementary Education, but I wound up teaching middle school for 4 years and getting my middle school endorsement. I know, I know, I’m that weirdo who enjoyed teaching middle school. Since I run the @comefollowmestudy social media accounts and website, I asked many of you what questions you had now that we are taking the “church-supported” portion of our Sundays away. 

And tons of you asked for advice on teenagers!

I’m going to share some ideas that I have from working as an English teacher for middle schoolers, EFY counselor, and YW leader, but I’ve also crowd-sourced some amazing ideas from my followers at @comefollowmestudy as well! If you have any thoughts to share, please comment below or join the conversation on my Instagram page!

LOVE is the answer

Teenagers are all over the map when it comes to their spiritual development. 

• If you’ve got a teen who is ready and willing to participate in any gospel activities you have at home, then make sure you express your love and appreciation for them. 
• If your teen is more casual about the gospel right now, make the Sabbath a day when you can express your love to them and meet them where they are.

If Sundays become a source of contention, then it will be difficult to get any gospel learning done.

Remember Elder Holland’s sage advice: “Maybe you can’t teach them yet, but you can love them. And if you love them today, maybe you can teach them tomorrow.”

Get them involved in planning

Just like the new youth initiative focuses on youth making the plans for activities and goals, have your youth help plan Sundays. 

Ask them what activities they think might be appropriate for the Sabbath. Ask them what they want to work on now that church can be whatever they want it to be. Allow them to seek personal revelation to contribute to the planning. 

If there is something that you want them to prepare for Sunday (check out all of my ideas for using the Come Follow Me curriculum in your families here), consider giving them time on Sunday morning to do that preparation. The rest of their week is probably filled with school assignments or other activities, so set realistic expectations and have them prepare a short message or thought on Sunday to share later in the day. 

Keep things fun and interesting!

Just because they might act like they are too cool for school (that phrase alone makes me seem uncool, I know), doesn’t mean that they don’t want some fun. 

Ever tried giving a room full of teenagers paper and crayons and asking them to draw an image from a story? It will literally be the highlight of some of their days. 

You might not get too much enthusiasm from asking them to dress up and act stories out, but stick to drawing, writing, physical games, songs, and videos, and you can keep them engaged pretty well!

Make room for discussion

Pretty much everyone likes to talk about themselves. Given the right conditions, think of discussion questions that might help them open up about personal struggles, questions, or testimonies that they have. To help you out, I’ve created Study Guides for every book in the Book of Mormon so far that give you tons of guiding questions for each chapter. 

I also post at least 5 spiritual thoughts every week on my Instagram page @comefollowmestudy. You could read through all of these thoughts and discuss your ideas afterward. (You can also access all my posts on my website HERE.)

And moments of silence are SO IMPORTANT for teens. There have been so many times where I have shared a message, and just waited in the silence for a bit. Suddenly, hands shoot up as kids make connections and think of stories to share. 

Get them in the scriptures

Sometimes, it is tempting to act as their “teacher” a little too much. Who is the best teacher of all? The Savior. And we learn about him through the scriptures. 

Have they read the assigned scriptures for “Come Follow Me” this week yet? If not, set aside time on Sunday to just sit and read! If they’ve already read the chapters, consider teaching them how to “study” a little better by re-reading and looking for connections and questions. 

Ask them questions that get them looking back in the scriptures to answer.

Do you know a specific struggle or question that they have right now? Give them a personal challenge to look for answers within the scriptures. 

Again, look through my long list of ideas for using the Come Follow Me curriculum HERE for even more ideas to get them in their scriptures. 

Set expectations beforehand

Is everyone sleeping in? Should they be awake and ready by a specific time? Are you meeting as a whole family at a specific time? Whatever you decide is best for your family, make sure they know the expectations beforehand. 

Nothing will cause more contention than teens not meeting expectations they didn’t even know existed. 

Analyze and be willing to change

Your teens will appreciate being respected enough to ask their opinion on a Sunday night. 

“How did today go? How can we do better next week? What should we start, stop, and continue?”

Their feedback will be invaluable for making adjustments for the following week, instead of just plowing along with what you think is working. 

Keep your own studies going

Actions speak louder than words. ESPECIALLY to teenagers.

The best way to teach them that reading the scriptures is important is to have them see you reading the scriptures. 

So take time to make sure your spiritual tank is filled. Be a great example of immersing yourself in the gospel on Sundays, and your family will naturally follow suit. (Or, if they don’t follow suit right now, they’ll always have that example in the back of their mind.)

Your teenagers will be such a helpful tool in this home-centered church. They are awesome. Their testimonies are powerful and pure. Share your successes with others! Help them with what has worked well, and don’t be afraid to let go of habits that aren’t working well.

Comment below with any other tips specifically for teens, and be sure to read my full post on using Come Follow Me HERE. 

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

The post Teenagers Edition: Totally Home-Centered Church Survival Guide first appeared on Come Follow Me Study with Cali Black.