There was a doctrinal issue that I really struggled with several years ago.

I recognized that I felt pretty uneducated about the subject, because most of the “knowledge” I had was what some leader had taught me in class, or what I read in a blog post one time.

So I went on a search for knowledge and truth from the best sources that I could find.

And I actively tried to ignore anyone else’s perspectives or interpretations, no matter how right they sounded.

My search brought me to 4 places, essentially.

The scriptures.

General Conference manuscripts.

The plethora of other church-produced materials provided on the church’s website.

And prayer.

I stuck to those 4 locations.

I searched a lot. I pondered a lot. I took it slowly.

D&C 88:118 really touches my heart and reminds me of this time in my life.

Here, the Lord teaches:

“Seek ye diligently and teach one another words of wisdom; yea, seek ye out of the best books words of wisdom; seek learning, even by study and also by faith.”

I didn’t read my answer anywhere written in stone.

But eventually, I had as much knowledge as if it had been.

I prayed and had promptings and felt the spirit whisper to me enough that I realized I knew at least portions of the answers I had been seeking.

And I felt a deep, eternal, and confident peace in the things I still didn’t know.

That was hard sometimes for my brain to wrap itself around– the fact that I didn’t find my answer explicitly hidden somewhere.

Instead, I had to also use faith to fill in some of the spaces.

But deep down, I was just as sure in my knowledge as if I had learned it through any other way.

Knowledge and wisdom are out there. It’s hard to imagine that someone hasn’t already discovered the truth and I can just google enough that I can find it.

With the real, deep stuff, I’ve learned to rely on my own judgment, to be led by the Spirit to the best sources.

And then to let my faith step in for the rest.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black

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4 Responses

  1. Thank you, I needed to hear that today…I am older hopefully wiser but still trying to learn and there are times I still don’t understand.

  2. I’ve had a very similar experience. I’ve struggled with a certain point of doctrine. I studied it out only using those resources you named. I still don’t entirely understand, but like you said, there’s an element of faith required that fills in the gaps and brings peace. One of the general authority quotes I live by is from Elder Anderson’s talk hears back- “You don’t know everything, but you know enough.”

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