Is it possible to just notice imperfections without judging?
Literally only a few days ago, I wrote a post about not condemning others because of their imperfections.
But, the truth is, we are going to see imperfections in people all around us.
(I mean, I don’t even need to tell you that, right?!)
So how do we notice imperfections but stop ourselves from feeling judgmental thoughts?
One of my favorite strategies is to give that other person every benefit of the doubt, every ounce of grace…
While also gathering information for how I want to be in the future.
Here’s what I mean – (hypothetical situation!)
After not having contact for a while, my Relief Society President texts me, “Have you done your ministering assignments yet?”
My first thought?
Hmmmm, that was a little out of the blue and feels a little rude to me. I’m actually struggling with something right now, and she didn’t even ask how I was doing. There’s also one sister that I’m having a tough time connecting with, so this is going to be a little awkward to try and explain.
But then I try to quickly move to grace on her part.
You know, she is doing so much. She always has a smile on her face and I love how she is so kind. I bet she’s just wanting to check in on how my ministering is going because she cares so much about everyone. If I told her I was struggling, she would totally care and want to help me.
But here’s the cool part that I love, that Moroni so beautifully reminds us that we need to be filled with gratitude for.
I make a mental note that if I have an assignment to check if someone else has done something, I want to make sure that I first ask them how they are doing, and make sure they know that I care about them more than having an assignment completed.
Both are possible.
Loving someone, assuming the best of them, AND improving myself from their imperfections.
And it’s one of my favorite things to do in the scriptures.
Instead of idealizing each scripture figure, I love learning about and from them, giving them full respect and understanding…
While also improving myself from the things they did that I don’t love.
We can actually be, as Moroni suggests, filled with gratitude that we can notice imperfections in other people.
As long as we use that recognition to become even more wise in our own lives.
Happy Studying!
-Cali Black
2 Responses
This is just what I needed to hear today as it is my turn to teach my Come Follow Me study group from Mormon 7-9. I myself have been directly told by the Lord to not be judgemental. I have been trying to improve. My favorite strategy is to try and view the person through the Lord’s eyes. That allows me to see the positive and not focus on negative interaction I am having with them. Now you’ve given me another tool in my strategy kit. Thank you!
I love that you have already been implementing a great strategy to see the positive in others. You must have such a great influence on others as you interact positively with them and see them through the Lord’s eyes. Thank you for sharing!