Trying to remember

I made the decision a few years ago to never falsely agree with someone in conversation if I didn’t actually agree with them.

You know, when someone says something like, “And she never even said anything about it! So rude!”

And you instinctively want to say, “Oh yeah! Crazy!” or something.

I didn’t like that feeling that came after I “kept the peace” in the moment, while sacrificing my integrity.

And so I committed to just not say anything in return. (Unless I felt strongly that I needed to speak up.)

But then, the very next day after making this big commitment, I found myself in a conversation with a coworker where I was just agreeing with some negative things they were saying.

I felt so disappointed when the conversation ended.

Because I had completely forgotten in the moment what I previously had felt such a strong conviction for.

Remembering is strangely difficult, right?!

It took me weeks and weeks and months and months before I made progress on remembering.

And now, it’s pretty natural to me. I remember it virtually every time.

We promise our Heavenly Father that we will always remember His Son.

We KNOW so much about Jesus. We learn of him all the time.

And yet, it can be so weirdly difficult to ALWAYS REMEMBER him throughout the week.

I even feel myself moving along a continuum. Some days, I think very often of my Savior, and my heart is humbled in constant prayer.

But other times, I’m just doing so many things, that I honestly forget to remember him all of the time.

And it feels a little weird to say that – but I’m guessing that since promising, yet again, to always remember the Savior is a part of our weekly sacrament prayers, I’m probably not alone in this.

Remembering is weirdly difficult, despite how much we know about a topic, or even how committed we feel to “remember”.

The only thing I’ve learned that helps?

Practice.

And a lot of prayer.

And slowly, we’ll build up how quickly and how often we can remember.

Happy Studying!

-Cali Black